Elton John and Madonna BURY HATCHET with RACY NEW DUET

[Penelope]

After fooling him into thinking she was ACTUALLY SABRINA CARPENTER, the two have ended their DECADES LONG FEUD and released a CHARITY COVER FOR CHARITY titled 'CAN YOU FEEL MY CUNT TONIGHT'

THOUSANDS DEAD

 

[funky]

Is this the start of OH GOD NOT ANOTHER ONE Elton duets albam?

Maybe the rumoured collab with Katy Perry, “ROCKET (Wo)MAN (Bezos edit)” will finally see the light of day!

 

[Lucille]

KATY PERRY has been SHELTERING from a BARRAGE OF CRITICISM in ELTON’S CAVERNOUS MAN CUNNY.

 

[funky]

Una Stubbs said to be negotiating from BEYOND THE GRAVE to reimagine KiKi Dee from NOT QUITE BEYOND THE GRAVE in a “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart” do-over

RuPaul said to be BEWILDERED but NOT ALTOGETHER SURPRISED

 

[Joseph]

RuPaul STUNS in new photo spread in FRACKING MAGAZINE. Elton John claims THIS is what caused his blindness.

 

[GNL]

BREAKING: Madonna has freed sixteen Bel Ami cast mates, assumed dead, from Elton's basement.

 

[Sheena]

BREAKING: Madonna has freed sixteen Bel Ami cast mates, assumed dead, from Elton's basement.

“Only when I’m dancing can they feel this free” she was heard to exclaim.

 

[Suedehead]

Darren Hayes to release deluxe reissue of Homosexual in celebration of this momentous occasion. Bonus material to include limited edition, numbered sex toys modeled on Elton John’s manhood

 

[Agneeta]

Sad this is STALLING in the charts.

Turns out a Newsround appearance wasn't ENOUGH.

I guess their last hope is that it will be played in the Queen Vic during a FIGHT SCENE.

 

[Penelope]

Sad this is STALLING in the charts.

Turns out a Newsround appearance wasn't ENOUGH.

I guess their last hope is that it will be played in the Queen Vic during a FIGHT SCENE.

It was a LONG-RUNNING NUMBER ONE! (two weeks)