Presenting your CUNTS and QOLS of 2018

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AGinAg (37)

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I'm feeling QUITE SHIT, so I'll keep this relatively QUICK.

I will now present your biggest CUNTS of the last year, followed I presume with KindaCool and your QOLs of the year.
 
First up 30 to 21:

21 Michael Gove 10
21 Tekashi 6ix9ine 10
23 Sarah Huckabee Sanders 9
24 Jess Glynne 8
25 Alexander Rybak 7
25 Richard Branson 7
27 Jim Davidson 3
28 AJ Pritchard 0
28 Emmanuel Macron 0
28 Seann Walsh 0

As you can see AJ, Emmanuel and Seann failed to score a single point, however all time cunt Jim Davidson was otherwise the lowest scorer. He did raise his racist head this year. Now Richard Branson is a FUCKING CUNT. Obviously a media darling for many years, he's very much the Phil Collins of business to me. Least we not forget he SUED THE NHS BECAUSE HE DIDN'T GET HIS WAY. Rybak mugged his way back to Eurovision, it was horrible, while Glynne continued her unwarranted domination of the charts. Sarah Huckabee Sanders is guilty by association, being a grumpy cunt and being generally humourless.
 
20-16

16 Phillip Green 18
17 Coleen Nolan 17
18 Morrissey 15
19 Cardi B 12
20 Melania Trump 11

Phillip Green was always a cunt, but to add to shitting on people's lives, it was really this year that he really was quite HANDS ON. For me Melania balances being a cunt and a QOL with astonishing ease. Coleen is a bitch. Don't fuck with Queen of Hearts Kim Woodburn. I'm GLAD you had a shit time of it. BULLY! Now Morrissey really got away with his position, seeing as he came out this year as a FUCKING NAZI, even some of his fans finally gave up on him. The whole Cardi B/ Nicki Minaj thing passed me the fuck by.
 
Before we go any further let's have a quick look at Tekashi 6ix9ine. He believe he's in prison @Mugatu to confirm.

tekashi-69.jpg
 
Not surprised AJ Pritchard got no points after he got a kicking for Christmas. Moopy's not THAT cunty...
 
With Morrissey, I think we're all just passed him now. We know he's a twat, he can't really make it much worse.
 
15-11

11 Roxanne Pallett 31
12 Roseanne Barr 30
13 Graham Lineham 23
14 Steve Bannon 19
15 Nicki Minaj 18

Steve Bannon is of course a cunt and now he's plaguing Europe with this shit. We've BEEN THERE ALREADY thanks. Now Graham Lineham once wrote Father Ted, now he writes tweets where he compares trans-activism to Nazism. What he has to with it, I DO NOT KNOW. We all know what Roseanne did and the astonishing consequences. What was almost worse was the follow up behaviour.

Now Roxanne Pallett has been discussed for hours. What she did wasn't the work of just a dreadful person, but someone with real personality issues. STOP LYING!
 
I wasn't totally clear on who Roxanne Pallett was, I assumed she was something to do with Eurovision. :D
 
10. Theresa May 35

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Shocker! I mean she's had a shit time and she's a rubbish PM. I hate to say it, but the shit dancing and stubborn bloody mindedness does endear me to her just a little. Not a lot. We'll have forgotten about her by summer. Up from 12 last year.
 
When's the vote on her deal? 11th, was it? If so, she'll be gone by the 14th.
 
octophone said:
I wasn't totally clear on who Roxanne Pallett was, I assumed she was something to do with Eurovision. :D
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She was on CBB and pretended one of the male housemates had punched her - not for jokes, she sincerely faked the whole drama and it almost ruined him.
 
Ag said:
She was on CBB and pretended one of the male housemates had punched her - not for jokes, she sincerely faked the whole drama and it almost ruined him.
Click to expand...

Oh, I know now, I checked but the whole thing went right passed me at the time.
 
octophone said:
Not surprised AJ Pritchard got no points after he got a kicking for Christmas. Moopy's not THAT cunty...
Click to expand...

Yes, I might otherwise have been tempted to throw him a point or two. I see the brother is now angling to get a spot on Strictly off this now though.
 
8 Arlene Foster 42

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This cunt has serious power in UK politics. Bigoted, racist, backwards - I hope she drowns.
 
Theresa May only #10 is a surprise. Not that I gave many points to that LOCAL celebrity.
 
Arlene Foster is currently facedown in a pool of homebrew-generated vomit, wearing a hat that says "Happy 2019th Birthday, Earth".
 
7 Elon Musk 43

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A year ago I think, I thought I liked him. But the whole calling the rescuers in the Thai Cave drama, a PEDO, because no-one wanted his submarine really showed this twat right up. There's also a whole thing with him, Grimes and Azealia Banks, which is just WEIRD.
 
Oddly, my dad and I were just talking about Musk. He's gone right off-kilter, so he has. Mind you, if I'd committed the perfect murder by firing someone into space in a car, I'd be giddy with success too.
 
=5 Tommy Robinson 61

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If ever there's a lesson from history - don't imprison leaders of racist minority group, as it makes a hero of them and sometimes they're Hitler. Somehow this super shit rag has now infiltrated former thing UKIP and become some of sort of darling of the extreme right. What's to like?
 
There's a face I couldn't tire of kicking.

(Robinson, not Kanye. Or Ellie's avatar)
 
=5 The Conservative Party 61

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It's hard to keep up with anything they do that isn't Brexit and generally sideways shit themselves inside out. I suspect fox hunting and harpooning whales became legal today and no one noticed because BREXIT.
 
The shipping contract to the company with no ships the other day was something of a winner. They're not even trying now. They KNOW everything's fucked.
 
4 Boris Johnson 63

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If you wanted to know how desperate this guy is to lead, he's now dabbling with imitating Trump. I generally believe this man has peaked.
 
3 Piers Morgan 69

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I don't follow what this high profile troll has to say. I have too much of that shit at work. But he's some recent work.
 
So the top 2 was very close - last years's winner Donald Trump and last year's No.4 - Jacob Rees Mogg.
 
Calling Daniel Craig “emasculated” for carrying his child was a lowlight, amongst the Trump arse-licking.
 
Which reminds me, I forgot to nominate Bono for saying that allergies are emasculating :manson: (as well as general cuntiness obvs)
 
Kate said:
Which reminds me, I forgot to nominate Bono for saying that allergies are emasculating :manson: (as well as general cuntiness obvs)
Click to expand...

He did smash his head open when he fell off his bike, I suppose.
 
At No.2 is...







































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2 Jacob Rees Mogg 125pts

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It's an irony that a man so against abortion for reason of his precious bible, is easily someone that would have benefited from such. His failure to dislodge May, because her Brexit isn't hard enough was an embarrassment. In case you missed it he's now fundraising for the DUP. Least we not forget his only political power in the UK, is as a spokesperson for CUNTS. He is nothing but a media fascination.

So that means, rather inevitably...

1 Donald Trump 139 points

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#PrayingForAFatalHeartattack #CancerWouldDo
 
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