Moopyvision 2010-2019 Round 5: Azerbaijan, Ireland & Slovenia

Well I thought that was a lovely song (and video) so congratulations Perry or whatever his name was :disco:

Sadly this means that my XXX folder remains closed :)
 
Azerbaijan felt like a great album that was missing out on one killer single. They were almost all good songs that just didn't have something or other.
 
AZERBAIJAN

10th: Dilara Kasimova - Start a Fire

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By 2014 Azerbaijan had become a byword for crass showboating at Eurovision, and it was perhaps with that charge in mind that they opted for a more organic approach - albeit one still entirely penned by Swedes and featuring a trapeze artist flailing around in the background. Hey, by their standards it's the soul of subtlety!

Ultimately though, this is an object lesson on the value of staying ON BRAND, because really, who the fuck wants a dreary ballad from Azerjeben? Not Moopy, and evidently not Europe either, this was a semi final Jury save and still their worst-performing qualifier to date (22nd).

1 x 12 (Suomi)
8 x 0 (VoR, Penelope, Kevin, Pingu, dmlaw, NonEvent, Jacques, Ag)
 
Well this is certainly a remedy :disco:

Start A Fire is by no means wonderful but crucially, better than anything churned out by that last unspeakable country
 
I'm heading out soon but absolutely love my top 4 Azeri choices. So if one of them doesn't win there'll be trouble :angry:
 
9th: Sabina Babayeva - When The Music Dies (55pts)

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Respectable home-ground ballad that somewhat inexplicably finished as high as FOURTH. Whether by means fair or foul, Azerbaijan were truly on imperial form at this point.

I often wonder about these Azeri singers - what happens to them? Maybe it's a cultural thing, but the majority of Eurovision singers maintain something of a presence after the Contest, even if they have to go back to the Boots counter afterwards. You never seem to hear a thing about the Azeri ones, though. Are they just constructed in a lab in Baku and melted down for bullet casings after the credits roll? Would 100% subscribe to this investigative podcast.

1 x 12 (Jacques)
4 x 0 (Buttertart, lolly, SDF, Superstylin')
 
Aren’t they just MACHINE GUNNED if they don’t win? I’m VERY good friends with the Azeri Head of Delegation and that’s what he told me :)
 
I think I spent the entirety of When The Music Dies thinking I'd REALLY RATHER be listening to Jamelia - Stop
 
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8th: Ell & Nikki - Running Scared (76pts)

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Please tell me I'm not the only person who is to this day incapable of mentally referring to this as anything other than "Running, I'm Scared"? Thank you very much Sarah Dawn Finer...

Anyway, THE WINNER gets short shrift on Moopy. In fairness, I think the low general opinion of this is more about what it beat than anything else. I was revealing my Eurovision loonery to a new colleague the other day and she cited this as her favourite Eurovision winner ever, so evidently it had some impact outside fan circles.

Didn't do a thing after the credits rolled of course, but it did bring the Contest to Baku, which seems by all accounts to have been delightfully mad. 2012 was the last year I didn't attend, but I suspect I won't be waiting too long before we're back again...

4 x 8 (Ag, Jacques, dmlaw, Win The Game)
4 x 0 (Alla, sewerynsven, kevin7, Raining on Me)
 
And on the topic of where the Azeri contestants end up afterwards, NORTH LONDON BIT OF ROUGH Nikki is one of the few I can think of that actually did anything - she piggybacked onto the ALSO quite lovely 2012 Danish Melodi Grand Prix entry Universe and turned it into a duet for a single re-release

 
I truly didn't need to justify giving Running Scared a big fat zero just because it was a really shit winner. I really do hate it more than the rest of them. To be fair it's a strong field and it's not THAT bad, but even the ballads were better than this half arsed duet.
 
7th: Elnur Hüseynov - Hour of the Wolf (86pts)

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Now THIS is where things start getting good. :D

I've come to really love Azerbaijan for their utter lack of taste or restraint, and this is surely the most insanely over-choreographed entry they've sent to date. Female wolf (Wolf Kati?)'s demented entrance at the one minute mark is one of my favourite moments ever.

Song wise, it is almost entirely incomprehensible rubbish, but really darlings who's paying attention to THAT? Belying my earlier theory about Azeri singers all being single-use plastics, Elnur is their only returning contestant to date. He previously played a shrieking gay angel in their iconic first go of things, before they discovered those helpful Swedish songwriters for hire and became (marginally) less insane.

2 x 12 (Sewerynsven, Buttertart)
2 x 0 (Suomi, David_5000)
 
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The fact that nobody gave them more than 8, in a place where ANYTHING would get a 12 from the usual suspects, sums it all up. It's shit.
 
Oh I DO love Hour of the Wolf :D It always quite upset me that of all the musical theatre dross that year Morland and whatshertits won out over that

God love East London pocket bottom Elnur too, who was clearly gayer than a screaming purse :disco:

 
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Alla said:
The fact that nobody gave them more than 8, in a place where ANYTHING would get a 12 from the usual suspects, sums it all up. It's shit.
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I thought it was rather lovely. And Eli's 'young gay playing it straight' motif is SOMETHING. We've all been there at some point!
 
Penelope said:
Oh I DO love Hour of the Wolf :D It always quite upset me that of all the musical theatre dross that year Morland and whatshertits won out over that

God love East London pocket bottom Elnur too, who was clearly gayer than a screaming purse :disco:

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He definitely got a point or two for the looks from the DC jury.
 
6th: Farid Mammadov - Hold Me (97pts)

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Another entirely legitimate top 5 from Azerbaijan's imperial era. :side-eye:

To be fair, nonplussed as I was at the time, this actually holds up very well. For a country that still outlaws gays, the sheer HOMOSEXUAL DRAMA on display in this performance is really quite something. According to the ever-reliable Wikipedia, in addition to his singing career, Farid Mammadov is a keen practitioner of Greco-Roman wrestling... :side-eye::side-eye::side-eye:

Anyway song wise, it's the sort of melodramatic Russia-style pop you'd probably get from Sergey Lazarev these days. Slickly done, but not the most exciting thing the Azeris have ever chucked our way. Thank heavens for Emmelie DeForest, because this would have been another deeply underwhelming winner.

1 x 12 (SDF)
3 x 0 (Dark Carnival, Ill Advised, Zu Klara)
 
Penelope said:
God love East London pocket bottom Elnur too, who was clearly gayer than a screaming purse :disco:
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Given that he wouldn't take part without his dear friend Samir in 2008, I take from that he was obviously spent most of his time in Belgrade LEGS AKIMBO.
 
Hour of the Wolf is a big camp beauty.

Is literally every song they do a Swedish purchase then? Hour of the Wolf seems more quintessentially Azeri than much of the rest.
 
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