What do you want for Christmas?

But I can't ask my family for that so I've asked for nice underwear and some aftershave. That might indirectly get me a shag. I'll just then be missing a vaccine, no more lockdown and my confidence back. And to lose about six pounds. But it's a start.
 
COVID RELATED

It's ONLY TEMPORARY

at least that's what I keep telling myself in the mirror every day

It doesn't get any better.

Actually, it does. I looked properly good for about three weeks earlier this year. It's ALL GONE TO POT NOW THOUGH :D
 
Tell me about it. I'm really missing my friends right now. I poured the Lindt balls out into my FESTIVE REINDEER AND SLEIGH WITH ACCOUTREMENTS on Saturday and said "Just in case anyone pops in and so we have something to offer them" before Mr Sheena rightly stated that no one WILL be coming in.

I just want a BAG OF PILLS, a PACKET OF FAGS, a litre of GIN and some LOVELY FUCKING PEOPLE IN MY LIFE.

Having said that, I can't remember the last time I had a fag. Probably the longest period without one since I was a child...it's a good couple of months.

A couple of mates snook over the other weekend for dinner and then I remembered I had found a bag of mdma when moving. Ms Ron didnt fancy it so 3 of us had it while she DJed and we all gurned and hugged it was fucking amazing. But now I want to be off my tits with everyone being a pest and it suddenly being tomorrow. It’s driving me fucking MAD
 
@funky I’ve seen you pop up on my Facebook friend suggestions (:D) and from what I can see you don’t need to loose anything love!
 
@funky I’ve seen you pop up on my Facebook friend suggestions (:D) and from what I can see you don’t need to loose anything love!

That's what all my stalkers say

But do keep flirting, it's the only lovin' I'm getting THIS CHRISTMAS
 
A couple of mates snook over the other weekend for dinner and then I remembered I had found a bag of mdma when moving. Ms Ron didnt fancy it so 3 of us had it while she DJed and we all gurned and hugged it was fucking amazing. But now I want to be off my tits with everyone being a pest and it suddenly being tomorrow. It’s driving me fucking MAD

Totally just had an MDMA saliva moment reading that.

I can't actually remember the last time I did drugs either. August Bank Holiday I think. Lovely day of drinking and a BBQ, drugs from 6 ("start early, finish early) and home by 1 to masturbate unsuccessfully for six hours, just in time for Mr Sheena to get up and for me to pretend to be asleep on the sofa whilst the room smells of cigarettes and poppers.

HOW I MISS MY LIFE!
 
I don't think I had any proper drugs this year. Last year was quite a bump (so to speak) in my cocaine usage (relatively speaking). That's what happens when all my old friends keep getting married.
 
Oh funky love, you're past the age where you can get it back, it's just a question of how gentle the decay is from here on in.

But I'm still young enough to be in denial, Lols!

I'm clinging on to it before that goes too!
 
I'm utterly out of shape. Can't claim Dad bod. That's just delusional. I just pose for slimming pictures, and maintain the illusion to everyone else.
 
NO ONE sends me friend requests from Moopy. I think they think I'm ALOOF and a HORRIBLE NASTY OLD BITCH in real life too.

They're right, of course :disco:
Oh you pop up now and then too! :D
 
I got into such good shape earlier this year and the ABSOLUTE FUCKING HORROR of the last two months have destroyed it. Not entirely- nowhere near where I was, but coming home and having a box of Lindt balls is NEVER going to help.
 
You have NEVER taken drugs and not had that FIVE HOURS of trying to finish?

You've never lived...

I just meant any type of masturbation is a success, whether you finish or not, SURELY...
 
I declined a friend request earlier today (my first new one for months) from an old childhood friend whose brother died last week. I felt horrible, but couldn't face accepting it and then starting a conversation about it.
 

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