Moopy Mafia 2021 - Sign Up Thread - Starts Sunday 7 February 2021 7.30pm BCT

[Iguana]

Well, I'm already lost

 

[Lucille]

Wait does Buttertart deal in Ottomans, cakes or abortions?!?

 

[ButterTart]

Wait does Buttertart deal in Ottomans, cakes or abortions?!?

The last two. Whoever heard of an ottoman salesman sidelining as an abortionist?

 

[Lucille]

Sorry, I must’ve imagined it during one of my episodes, thankfully the pharmacist has prescribed me this great new medicine called cocaine which is doing wonders.

 

[dmlaw]

Well, I'm already lost

You can probably ignore most of this nonsense. Unless, of course, at some point it amuses me to make your survival dependent on it.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

Wait does Buttertart deal in Ottomans, cakes or abortions?!?

I am Herr Dedkinder, of The Fine Ottomans Emporium. What are your ottoman needs for today?

 

[ButterTart]

You can probably ignore most of this nonsense. Unless, of course, at some point it amuses me to make your survival dependent on it.

This 'nonsense' is the very real lives of an incestuous Bavarian community. We will not be diminished by our Creator God like this.

 

[Lucille]

I am Herr Dedkinder, of The Fine Ottomans Emporium. What are your ottoman needs for today?

I’m looking for a strong, sturdy Ottoman, at least 6ft with soft hands, and who isn’t put off by a sloppy hole.

 

[Kate]

I can confirm that Herr Dedkinder’s ottomans are excellent, as bar seating, mustard storage and for hiding gays and Jews.

 

[Suomi]

I am Suomi, and the villagers call me ‘Dissertation’ because I’m a real piece of work

 

[AGinAg (37)]

I’m looking for a strong, sturdy Ottoman, at least 6ft with soft hands, and who isn’t put off by a sloppy hole.

I can do that. I have a fine specimen out back. He also comes free with a bottle of fridge chilled semen.

My price? I'll take anything frankly.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

I can confirm that Herr Dedkinder’s ottomans are excellent, as bar seating, mustard storage and for hiding gays and Jews.

They really are just the ticket for just about anything. Only last year, one of my customers stored over 30,000 lizards in one of my 'Lizard Ottomans'.

 

[ButterTart]

A bakery, an ottoman showroom and a Honeytrap service. Our little village of Bad Badleroybraun does quite well for itself considering we don't have a well, electricity or access roads.

 

[Lucille]

Let’s not forget it’s burgeoning cabaret scene as well!

 

[jivafox]

CABURLESQUE.

 

[ButterTart]

And the many whores and lesbians knocking around at the Haddaway Bierkeller, the rural hostelry where one can get both WKD and CJD.

 

[ButterTart]

Or is the Caburlesque show AT the Haddaway Bierkeller?

 

[dmlaw]

Bad Badleroybraun

Not, in fact, the village name but nonetheless genius.

 

[Kate]

Our function room is currently undergoing refurbishment after a certain unnamed “tart with a heart”’s 50th birthday celebrations resulted in considerable damage (not to mention the outbreak of STDs). We have tried having the Caburlesque in the Biergarten, but the performers were finding their tassels were falling off if it was a bit chilly.

 

[ButterTart]

Not, in fact, the village name but nonetheless genius.

It's just the local nickname, we all know it's actually [EDIT AFTER DIEGO ANNOUNCES NAME IN THE MAIN THREAD] and, frankly, we think it's a beautiful name anyway.

 

[ButterTart]

Our function room is currently undergoing refurbishment after a certain unnamed “tart with a heart”’s 50th birthday celebrations resulted in considerable damage (not to mention the outbreak of STDs). We have tried having the Caburlesque in the Biergarten, but the performers were finding their tassels were falling off if it was a bit chilly.

I remember that night. She was pure raging because everyone had bought her an ottoman or a cake, but the choices are fairly limited around here. The locals weren't too fussed if the tassels came off, by the way. In fact, we were quite in favour of it.

 

[GNL]

The Haddaway Bierkeller? A bit LOWBRAU for a FRAU of my breeding.

 

[Penelope]

 

[Kate]

The Haddaway Bierkeller? A bit LOWBRAU for a FRAU of my breeding.

Yes yes, we know you PRETENTIOUS TYPES prefer the Snap! Weinhaus. Just cos you’re hoping to get off with a Nazi officer some day.

 

[Dark Carnival]

IM HERE

 

[AGinAg (37)]

Less than two hours before the insanity begins.

As ever I HAVE NO GAME PLAN

 

[Lucille]

Why would a villager need a game plan?

 

[AGinAg (37)]

I'm showered and ready.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

Why would a villager need a game plan?

To work out the Mafia.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

I'm showered and ready.

Have wet wipes and piss pot, so I don't need to leave the sofa.

 

[jivafox]

Hyperventilating.

 

[big ron]

Ive had a big slab of brownie ready for this. Let the insanity commence.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

It's not Mafia without stoned @big ron for me.

 

[big ron]

Can’t wait to wildly suspect ms ron of slipping inside info to lucille

 

[big ron]

I have PROOF Soldi is really Eileen

 

[big ron]

And hes mafia

 

[Soldi]

I’m Rachey and I’m having a bath

 

[AGinAg (37)]

I'm COB and I'm having a giraffe.

 

[Soldi]

I’m not being funny but ZenGiraffe was BORN to be mafia.

 

[ButterTart]

I’m not being funny but ZenGiraffe was BORN to be mafia.

Of course he was, his real name is Zengiraffi Corleone.