This Sunday Of Mine

I'm going to spend the whole day in a PUB.

Real Housewives Of Atlanta Cheers GIF by Bravo TV
 
To think you could get hit on the head just walking down to the pork markets these days.
 
I delayed plans with a friend until this afternoon thinking I'd have a lie-in but I've been awake since 8 so now I'm just sat here... Waiting.
 
I set my alarm for 8.55am this morning. Why? Because the postman wouldn’t come before 9am.

Realise after getting up this morning that it’s Sunday so the postman won’t be coming today.

Then I sit there and think some more, until it hits me .... I’m not even expecting a delivery from the postman! So why I set my alarm for him, I do not know!
 
I need to get up on the extension roof and rake off all the moss. I've needed to do it for six years (according to FB memories) but the roof is completely covered now. It's only nine feet from the ground (seven feet at the point I climb up) so why does my arse go when I get to the top of the ladder every single time? I just don't have the guts to swing my leg off the top of the ladder and onto the roof :D

I wouldn't mind but I know the roof won't cave in because fat workmen tramped all over it last year to put scaffolding up, way fatter than I am.
 
I need to get up on the extension roof and rake off all the moss. I've needed to do it for six years (according to FB memories) but the roof is completely covered now. It's only nine feet from the ground (seven feet at the point I climb up) so why does my arse go when I get to the top of the ladder every single time? I just don't have the guts to swing my leg off the top of the ladder and onto the roof :D

I wouldn't mind but I know the roof won't cave in because fat workmen tramped all over it last year to put scaffolding up, way fatter than I am.

I get people knocking on the door every few weeks asking if I want the moss taken off my roof. They go door to door here!
 
I met a police foresensic scientist last night. I asked her what the grossest thing she'd seen was. She said it was
bitten off eyelids
.
 
Is it true that if I hadn’t had my points deduction, then I would have had my best ever ASFM result by far and even been a contender for the crown? @Tisch please confirm!

If so, then this is by far my biggest regret of the last couple of months :( JUST SAY NO, KIDS
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Back
Top Bottom