COB's Creepers #4 - Halloween III: Season of the Witch (Sunday 24/10, 8pm!)

[ButterTart]

Silly outfit to be jogging in.

 

[straightorbroken]

Who is he running from, an acting coach?

 

[COB]

Ben Shapiro appears, ready for a rational debate

 

[Ellie]

"Jump scares" were shit even then

 

[jivafox]

World’s worst assassin.

 

[COB]

Oh good he's dead

 

[ButterTart]

When someone is being strangled in a horror film, they always spend ages reaching for something and the killer just allows them to do it. If you were that good at killing surely you'd notice them laboriously stretching for the fucking spanner they'll shortly be twatting you with?

 

[Ellie]

Am I right in thinking there's not even a witch in this either?

 

[jivafox]

Am I right in thinking there's not even a witch in this either?

There’s a WARLOCK

 

[ButterTart]

Am I right in thinking there's not even a witch in this either?

And it all happens in one season.

 

[ButterTart]

HERE'S THE JINGLE!

 

[jivafox]

THE SONG

 

[COB]

How do you steal a FIVE TON stone from Stonehenge?!

 

[COB]

 

[ButterTart]

How do you steal a FIVE TON stone from Stonehenge?!

An overcoat with fucking massive pockets.

 

[COB]

I still can't believe that kids would be THAT fussed about these masks, even in the Eighties. Not exactly TRACY ISLAND, are they?

 

[ButterTart]

No word of a lie I'd have bought one of those masks if that advert had been on in real life.

 

[COB]

I still can't believe that kids would be THAT fussed about these masks, even in the Eighties. Not exactly TRACY ISLAND, are they?

No word of a lie I'd have bought one of those masks if that advert had been on in real life.

NOTION RESCINDED WITH APOLOGIES

 

[jivafox]

I still can't believe that kids would be THAT fussed about these masks, even in the Eighties. Not exactly TRACY ISLAND, are they?

No word of a lie I'd have bought one of those masks if that advert had been on in real life.

 

[jivafox]

It’s ANNIE

 

[jivafox]

Not these SHIT MASKS

 

[ButterTart]

The squealing really didn't match the absolute disinterest on those children's faces.

 

[COB]

See @Ellie, there's a witch!

 

[straightorbroken]

I had a friend who claimed to be a warlock. I got rather spooked by it all, not least because we used to watch the chilling new adventures of Sabrina after the gym at around midnight. So basically I know what Laurie has been through.

 

[jivafox]

TURN THAT DOWN

 

[ButterTart]

It’s ANNIE

Holy shit I never realised

 

[straightorbroken]

This jingle backing track sounds like the beginnings of a Vengaboys number.

 

[ButterTart]

Jesus that woman is not fit to be a nurse if the ramblings of a severely injured man get her wide eyed and sweaty.

 

[COB]

Don't put up with his shit Agnes!

 

[straightorbroken]

This is quite the shift in tone from II.

 

[ButterTart]

I don't trust this doctor and his Yewtree 'tache.

 

[COB]

Them's murderin' gloves!

 

[COB]

This is quite the shift in tone from II.

Oh, just wait

 

[straightorbroken]

Does he think he's Joan Ferguson?

 

[Ellie]

Interesting killing method

 

[ButterTart]

That just seemed unnecessarily complicated.

 

[COB]

What are you looking at?
*Vogue*

 

[ButterTart]

I love how hospitals in horror films only have three members of staff and two patients.

 

[COB]

That other nurse trying to get in on the action, AS IF

 

[COB]

OMG