Sardonicus reviews a bunch of old 45s (1 Viewer)

Karyn White - Secret Rendezvous b/w Language Of Love (1989)

UK chart peak - Number 22

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@Sheena - it's ONE FOR ME & THEE, Shee! And to be fair also @funky @alla @Joseph & numerous others who after reviewing Karyn's 90s successes in Funky's thread are all here to demand a KARYN WHITE FORUM NOW.

This 1989 hit reached the US Top 10, & I was introduced to it at an early age due to it being featured on the amazing MONSTER HITS compilation. It initially flopped in the UK at #56, but a promo appearance on the then primetime Wogan chat show plus its UNDENIABLE FABULOUSNESS saw it reach a reasonable level of success in the top 30. Personally, I think it should have been a much bigger hit, but this was also the era that Janet Jackson was only charting hits around these positions in the UK too, so maybe there wasn’t the time to promote properly on both sides of the Atlantic, or this style of music didn't really catch on here until 1993 or so.

OUR KARYN started off as an in demand backing singer before teaming up with LA Reid & Babyface for her 1989 debut album. I'm sure Whitney was TAKING NOTES as she got Face on board for her 3rd album shortly afterwards, & in some ways "I'm Your Baby Tonight" is a bit of a sequel to this song. Karyn had stalled at #11 in the UK earlier in 1989 with the ballad "Superwoman" & that was the closest she got to the top 10 here, although I've never been HUGELY FUSSED on it - maybe you need to be a middle aged woman going through a divorce to TRULY GET IT. I do, however, give it credit for managing to get the words eggs, toast, juice, sugar & cream into the first verse without sounding completely LUDICROUS :D

This, however, is her FINEST MOMENT & the sort of song the :disco: emoji was INVENTED for, full of dramatic keyboard stabs, URGENT PLEADING backing vocals, an UTTERLY AMAZING drum beat bit that starts off the song & repeats throughout, & an increasingly excitable & sultry vocal performance from OUR KARYN as she tells a tale of an IMPOSSIBLY GLAMOROUS night of HOT LURVE with some SAUCY TYPE in a penthouse with OODLES OF WINE & I can only presume MULTIPLE ORGASMS. There's even a HIGHLY BEMUSING middle eight that makes her sound like she's in the middle of a SNEEZING FIT :D It's a 13/10 & in 36 years, I've never, ever tired of it & will always QUEEN OUT to the spoken word bit at the start.

B side "Language Of Love" was produced by Evan Rogers & Carl Sturken, who I knew sounded familiar - amongst their numerous hits I knew them best for writing "Power Of A Woman" for Eternal. This one is a bit of a prequel to that song's DRAMATIC SWOOPS, & although it's more of a work in progress sound for a production team HONING THEIR CRAFT, it's still a top little upbeat R&B tune that'll get you SWAYING ALONG. Not available on any album either, so a nice little exclusive for anyone shelling out for the 45.

Karyn married Terry Lewis in the early 90s & album #2 was therefore, unsurprisingly, produced by Jam & Lewis. It deservedly got her her only US number 1 with the :disco: "Romantic" & the follow-up singles, including her last charting hit, "Hungah" in 1994, were all decent too. Karyn had returned to Babyface for "Hungah" & she did break up with Terry shortly after & disappeared from the charts. Whether she'd gotten fed up with it all, wanted more time to raise her kids, or something else, I'm not sure. As the social media era took hold, Karyn resurfaced with a new album in 2012 & she appears to be back to performing at the very least these days. You've got a DEDICATED MOOPY FOLLOWING, STILL, KARYN LOVE :disco:
 
We were always behind on this freestyle/ New Jack/Jill Swing stuff, which was a shame, cause shit like this was fucking CORKING.

The singles from Karyn White were blinding across the board but this ups the TRAMPY DESPERATION stakes to make it an ULTRA HIGH CAMP bit of nonsense and she sells the shit out of it. Loves, I’ve said it before (many times) and I’ll say it again:

It WON’T stop
It DON’T stop

:disco:
 
We were always behind on this freestyle/ New Jack/Jill Swing stuff, which was a shame, cause shit like this was fucking CORKING.

The singles from Karyn White were blinding across the board but this ups the TRAMPY DESPERATION stakes to make it an ULTRA HIGH CAMP bit of nonsense and she sells the shit out of it. Loves, I’ve said it before (many times) and I’ll say it again:

It WON’T stop
It DON’T stop

:disco:
I know we've done this quote recently but it DOES BEAR REPEATING:

I'll be ON TIME.
You bring the WINE.
Then I'll LOCK THE DOOR.
And you'll be ALL MINE.

:disco: :disco: :disco:
 
Kaoma - Lambada b/w Instrumental (1989)

UK chart peak - Number 4

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Rather fittingly, these reviews end exactly where they started - with a single that reached number 4 in the UK in late 1989. Unlike Belinda Carlisle, though, Kaoma didn't see much longevity - I was always convinced this was a TRUE ONE HIT WONDER, with Kaoma topping the charts & then nothing ever following it up afterwards. I was AGOG to discover that it only got to #4 (although it DID top the charts across many countries across Europe, & unusually for a non-English language song, reached the US Top 50 too), & that they had a minor hit (#62) with "Dancando Lambada" - I'll include it here as it's rather :disco: & was perhaps hampered by a similar title that confused record buyers who may have assumed it was a remix of the original, although, let's face it, a career based around a brief DANCE FAD was never going to be a HARBINGER for LONGEVITY.

Unlike the ENJOYABLE BUT OBVIOUS NOVELTY OFFERINGS of Whigfield or Los Del Rio, though, "Lambada" does seem to have its roots in authentically Latin musicians, coming from Brazil, Martinique, Guadeloupe &, erm, France. They appear to have been recruited specifically to promote this single, which was in turn based on another Latino dancefloor hit from a few years prior. I'm actually not sure why or how the SAUCY RHYTHMS of the Brazilian Lambada dance took off the way it did in summer 1989 - whether the single led & the dance followed; if it organically built up across the continent over the decade; or if it came about due to being featured in a film or something (@octophone @lolly @jyxz not sure if any of you might know?) Obviously introducing such SULTRY FILTH to the UK back then shows us a clear path from Kaoma to the current state of BROKEN BRITAIN, of course - we're just TOO RESERVED for this sort of thing. Back to SEXUAL REPRESSION & KIDS UP CHIMNEYS PLEASE :disco:

It is, I assume, sung in Portuguese - I've never had a clue what the MINGE she's on about, but it's never stopped me garbling along with a load of OLD NONSENSE ever since it was featured on the MONSTER HITS compilation, which really does handpick some of the greatest MUSICAL MOMENTS of 1989. It's a genuinely decent song, with the video also capturing the feel just right - sunny, tropical, romantic, & with a SWAYING LILT that invites the sort of close up & personal dancing that the Lambada demands. I can imagine it sorted out THE WHEAT FROM THE CHAFF on the national dancefloors continent wide that year as to who had the right sort of RHYTHM or not, & it doesn't hustle you to move, more beckons you in a chilled & slightly HORNY manner. It's a song I enjoy very well in its own right & it provided a much needed DROP OF SUNSHINE towards the end of the year, in a time period when people still had to wait months for the songs they heard on holiday to get a UK release. The instrumental replaces her vocal with a saxophone, which is a bit too T'PAU for my liking, but still reminds me of sipping cocktails while looking out over the Mediterranean.

Kaoma were, of course, hurtling DOWN THE DUMPER by mid 1990, although singles & albums were released to a disinterested public through the 90s, who'd gotten all they needed with the one single. Things took a late & very SINISTER TWIST in 2017, however, with the still unsolved murder of lead singer Loalwa Braz, found in a burnt out car in Rio as the victim of either a botched robbery or revenge killing. A sad ending to a brief but bright & sunshiney moment of POP GLORY.

 
Pass. I think it was just one of those records that people heard on holiday and then tried to get hold of when they got home.
 
I always thought it was rubbish novelty at the TK r but if I’ve heard it in the past ten years, it’s brought a smile.
 
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Why SHOULDN'T I bring back this MUCH LOVED (:eyes:) thread after a year away? Who's stopping me - apart from various Moopy protestors who are all:

Bbc Uk GIF


I've been buying up a whole lot of excellent to crap stuff at a BARGAIN PRICE from Pop Boutique Liverpool in recent months. First review in 12 months on the way!

:jelena:
 
Blue Pearl - Naked In The Rain b/w Instrumental

UK chart peak - Number 4


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Blue Pearl formed in the late 80s as an unlikely combo of American vocalist, the fabulously named DURGA MCBROOM (upskirt) & British producer Youth, aka Martin Glover. OUR DURGA had been working with Pink Floyd around this time & Youth was a member of Killing Joke & was rapidly learning THE ROPES as an excellent producer with an ear for the commercial with a twist of the unusual, so I'm assuming they met via mutual acquaintances. Together, they created this quality tune that helped push dance music from the synthy house of the late 80s into a more definitively 90s sound, although in comparison to other tracks from the era, such as The Power by Snap!, it feels a little forgotten in comparison.

Naked In The Rain starts off with some DIRTY sounding BREATHING, then the whole track, lyrics & music alike, suggest a TROPICAL STORM & a bunch of FILTH going on between OUR DURGA & some HOT PIECE while a bunch of locals BURN HORRIBLY in a village fire nearby. Still, never mind saving them while there's a bit of COCK to be had, eh, Durg, love? :basil: The video follows a similar story, & as I was only 7, I'm not sure if the tabloids screamed SCANDAL but they probably did despite Page 3 & all their other hypocritical shite.

I was always convinced she sang step into the BASTARD rain but instead it's a less :disco:BLESSED rain. Anyway, top notch tune & despite a top 5 peak, it's always one that many (myself included) seem to overlook when listing 90s dance classics. It definitely has a much more modern sound than many of the dance hits from even 2 years before, which I think is testament to Youth's production skills & how expertly he'd learned his craft in Killing Joke. The instrumental B side only brings the clear care he'd taken on the track even more to the forefront.

Sadly, the follow-up, Little Brother, was perfectly fine but just lacked the OOMPH of Naked In The Rain & despite a top 20 appearance in early 1992 with the Bizarre Inc sampling Can You Feel The Passion, the collaboration spluttered out. This was still a few years before the likes of Sunscreem, M People, The Prodigy & Leftfield began producing fully coherent dance albums, so it's possible that this was another of those cases of one great tune with no idea of how to keep the momentum going when it hit. In the years since, OUR DURGA has continued with acting plus a variety of Pink Floyd collaborations, while Youth is still a top producer to this day, with a mile long list of credits & well deserved. He clearly tried to keep the NAKED IN THE RAIN theme going when he got Crowded House to record nude for the Together Alone album in 1993, before that came to an unfortunate end when Neil Finn got his pubes caught in the strings of his guitar :basil:

Sadly, Blue Pearl are one of the many dance acts of one incredible tune plus everything after being much less, but, hey, what a TUNE IT IS.
 
A truly MONUMENTAL song

Odd that she didn’t join the Alison Limerick, Rozalla, Juliet Roberts, Crystal Waters etc etc by bagging a 90s career off the back of a big dance single. She didn’t really do much with it.
 
Let's not pretend Juliet Roberts had a hit
I always felt like Caught In The Middle sounded like a top 10 hit at the time, but it seems very slight now. I did like it though, along with Juliet's numerous other minor successes. She's a Kwik Save CeCe Peniston.

Anyway:

COME & WASH AWAY THE PAIN
STEP INTO THE BASTARD RAIN :disco:
 
You know me I love ANY OLD SHITE. I should go DIGGING in the boxes in my GARAGE for NUGGETS 💩
 
Anyway I still think (CAN YOU) FEEL THE PASSION is great even if it is a GREAT BIG RIPOFF

Are you TIRED OF YOUR LIFE? Why don't you CHANGE IT.... ERR ERR ERR ERR ERRRRR ERR ERR ERR ERR ERRRR

BREAK THE GLASS STROKE THE JAGGED SHARD
BREAK THE RULES PRESS THE LIMIT HARD
 
I always file Naked in the Rain next to Vogue, as they were around vaguely at the same time (I think this came out a couple of months later) but, yes, like OUR SHIRL I do have a fondess for Can You Feel The Passion in the same way Try Me Out is my favourite Corona single, even though it's obviously not the best.
 
I am. I just never anticipated so much reading on this site. Don’t expect to see many posts from me this week because homework - (yes I’m sure this will be a relief to some). Leave A Light On is a very strong start though. Think Summer Rain just edges it - very peak singles period for BC. See you in a bit!
 
Adrian Gurvitz - Classic b/w Runaway (1982)

UK chart peak - Number 8

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I'm calling it now - we have reached the LOWEST POINT of the thread. By comparison to this piece of shit, Jive Bunny should be in line for a Nobel Prize for Literature & CANONISATION. A quick PERUSAL of Wikipedia reveals Adrian Gurvitz to have been in numerous 70s bands with little success before this became his only solo hit in early 1982.

I can only assume this was bought as a Valentine's gift & such by MISGUIDED BOYFRIENDS in order to become a hit. Personally I'd END IT ALL if someone had bought me this (& I don't just mean the relationship). It starts off with the lyrical combo of:

"I'm gonna write a classic,
I'm gonna put it in the attic,
Because baby I'm an addict,
An addict for your love"


VOMIT. At least Desree's WANK LYRICS had a bit of comedy value. His singing voice also gives me CHILLING REMINDERS of Chris DeBurgh, an artist I truly can't stand - although let's face it, even Aretha Franklin would struggle to POLISH THIS TURD.

B side "Runaway" is a staid rockier number that reminds me of old 70s bands like Rainbow. I'm not VERY FUSSED but at least it's not "Classic".

The only reason I can think why this song isn't regularly voted amongst the worst ever top 10 hits is because it's been rightfully UTTERLY FORGOTTEN ABOUT. I don't know what Adrian Gurvitz has been up to since this single departed the charts but I can only hope he's REPENTING for this MUSICAL SIN.
I need to introduce you to some crime:

 
I’ve skimmed. I want to say a few things. This is a wildly eclectic collection. When my mum died I made a b line for her singles collection - to me it all made sense because they were her’s. The only time i cried about her death was when i played one of the singles to a friend one evening and I suddenly couldn’t function in any meaningful way. I very much enjoyed seeing these singles you presented here.

Supplementary:

Lucky Lisp is an excellent b-side.

Into The Gap by The Thompson Twins is a woefully overlooked stone cold classic album.
 
I’ve skimmed. I want to say a few things. This is a wildly eclectic collection. When my mum died I made a b line for her singles collection - to me it all made sense because they were her’s. The only time i cried about her death was when i played one of the singles to a friend one evening and I suddenly couldn’t function in any meaningful way. I very much enjoyed seeing these singles you presented here.

Supplementary:

Lucky Lisp is an excellent b-side.

Into The Gap by The Thompson Twins is a woefully overlooked stone cold classic album.
It's a mix of my singles as a child, my mum & dad's singles, a random box of old crap a friend gave me & this RECURRENCE now is stuff I bought myself. The wild eclecticism hopefully makes the thread! Where else can you go from Belinda Carlisle to Jive Bunny to Chris Rea to Adrian Gurvitz to Blue Pearl? Thank you for reading! I put an effort into every post, even the horrible stuff.
 
It's a mix of my singles as a child, my mum & dad's singles, a random box of old crap a friend gave me & this RECURRENCE now is stuff I bought myself. The wild eclecticism hopefully makes the thread! Where else can you go from Belinda Carlisle to Jive Bunny to Chris Rea to Adrian Gurvitz to Blue Pearl? Thank you for reading! I put an effort into every post, even the horrible stuff.
I want to go back and read a number of the entries properly when I am more awake. Thank you for taking the time to share.
 
Jellybean featuring Elisa Fiorillo - Who Found Who (7" Edit b/w Uptown Dub)

UK chart peak - Number 10


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Don't be fooled - the 'Uptown Dub' is really just a fancy way of saying Instrumental :basil:

Jellybean found fame in the 80s as a New York nightclub DJ & collaborator with Madonna in the early years - not to mention being her long-term boyfriend at the time. Once his personal & professional relationship with Marge RAN ITS COURSE, he was a big enough name in the DJ/producer fields to be able to put singles & albums out under his own name. There's only SAW I can think of that also did this - to middling success - at the time, but Jellybean saw a brief FLURRY of hits, possibly due to him showcasing various new singers each time out & every release providing a different flavour to the last.

First hit Sidewalk Talk was written & had backing vocals provided by Marge, but it's a tad forgettable & only made a minor impact on the charts. Come 1987 to 1988 though, he released his most successful album, Just Visiting This Planet, accompanied by 4 UK top 20 successes - the Luther Vandross aping The Real Thing with Steven Dante, the ARTY LES stylings of Just A Mirage with Adele Bertei, the absolutely :disco: Jingo - with Jellybean leading chants of the title over the instrumental, & this cute little love song with teenager Elisa Fiorillo, which gave him his only top 10 hit over the Christmas 1987 period.

It's absolutely OF ITS TIME, of course, with the twinkling synths & saxophone break being 2 GO TO sounds of the late 80s, but it's a catchy, cheery little DITTY with Elisa's BUOYANT & JOYOUS vocal performance helping lift it out of the myriad of similar songs available at the time. She genuinely seems to be having a good time & believes in what she's singing, & a clip of their Top of the Pops performance backs this up, as she struts around the stage in a performance that gives a fair amount of STAR QUALITY - notwithstanding the towering Working Girl perm & Pat Butcher styled huge hoop earrings.

Elisa's record company tried to push her down the Tiffany/Debbie Gibson route with solo follow-up How Can I Forget You, but although decent it was lost in the crowd in a SATURATED MARKET of teen girl pop stars & only scraped the UK Top 50. Elisa spent years after as an in demand backing singer & eventually joined Prince's New Power Generation band - a perfectly respectable music career, but it's a shame she didn't do more, she had some star potential.

Jellybean, meanwhile, seemed to suffer a similar fate to SAW as the 90s hit, as he went from hugely in demand producer able to concurrently release his own singles to being no longer the go-to name overnight. Perhaps recognising that his brush with fame was done, he pivoted into writing scores for films & remains a legend on the DJ circuit, popping up here & there for an occasional spin at festivals & such. I do wonder what caused this sudden abandonment of his skills though - was he (perhaps like SAW) seen as an 80s relic as artists tried to change their sound to fit the new decade, or is there something else I'm missing entirely? From fame to relative obscurity a year or 3 later - it's a tale as old as time.
 
I think the main problem was being BORING

I am in rare disagreement as I absolutely ADORE
Who Found Who and I had it on 12” at the time and maybe even still do.

The desperate later bridgey/outro/end of song bit where it all kicks off is my favourite, “Don’t throw away this chance cause it might just be your laaaast”.

I got it around the same time as the (brilliant and underrated) Pepsi & Shirlie debut album and always thought it would have suited them wonderfully.
 
I am in rare disagreement as I absolutely ADORE
Who Found Who and I had it on 12” at the time and maybe even still do.

The desperate later bridgey/outro/end of song bit where it all kicks off is my favourite, “Don’t throw away this chance cause it might just be your laaaast”.

I got it around the same time as the (brilliant and underrated) Pepsi & Shirlie debut album and always thought it would have suited them wonderfully.
The 'Hold Me, Show Me' bridge is my favourite (with orchestral STABS)
 

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