The Real Housewives of Melbourne (1 Viewer)

Oh no, now Fake Psychic Grifter & KEVIN want to have BABIES! :zombie:

Vomit Barf GIF
 
Sardonicus said:
Oh no, now Fake Psychic Grifter & KEVIN want to have BABIES! :zombie:

Vomit Barf GIF
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Oh who CARES about these 2 now I've completed Episode 10 & there's been so much DRAMA!

• I'll get to Gina's argument with Andrea in a minute, but firstly, WHAT A SEASON! It's like a lesson in how to do reality TV. Throw out endlessly hilarious & memeable quotes, have fun & tip a wink to the camera that it's all CAMP FUN, dominate every scene you're in & most that you're not, & take down your enemies by using all their worst character traits against them to deflect from anything you've also done wrong :disco:

• Yes, Andrea, if someone sent me a threatening legal email, called me a cunt behind my back, was constantly rudely late to everything & cocked up my expensive tennis court & bathroom I'd be peeved too. There's a way you could have spun this to come across as hard done by & sympathetic, but that'd require things you lack, such as BASIC KINDNESS & HUMAN EMPATHY. The cancer party that Gina hosted is a prime example - be the bigger person & show up to support her recovery from a serious health issue & raise money for a good cause. Instead she comes across as WORSE & MORE SPITEFUL than anyone. An absolute RAT.

• Lydia ain't bright enough to realise she's the Gretchen Wieners caught between 2 Regina George's all season & she backed the wrong horse.

• Chyka, love, you seem a kind & decent person but you have done NOT A THING of note all season. Plus, where is this husband? Does he not show up until later or did I miss him earlier on? Meanwhile KEVIN is never off the screen :eyes:

• I want FPG & KEVIN's shitty cocktail business to fail because she's preying on the gullible & grieving & KEVIN is annoying & not hot. Sorry not sorry.

• I can imagine the Gina vs Andrea dinner is already the stuff of LEGEND so I won't say much but I can't leave it without "Maybe Lydia could wash her VAGINA in it" & "Good luck with your deck of cards... fucking moron" :D:disco:

• I'm heading out shortly but looking forward to Gina EVISCERATING that RAT at the reunion next
 
Chyka is the straight man which is needed to hold any housewife franchise together, hot husband and a LOVELY HOUSE are the other perks.
 
Yes he does have the look of a man who would slam twinks bareback at the cruising ground between business meetings.
 
It's been SO LONG since I watched it but I loved that Gina totally messed up Angela's house of cards read, yet made it all the more iconic. That's just what Gina DOES.
 
Sardonicus said:
Oh I've just seen clips of BRUCE in the reunion & now I get it. I must have not been paying attention the first time around!
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Thoughts after watching both parts of the reunion:

• Gina came across mean, domineering & unpleasant - if it wasn't for her ability to effortlessly pull out quotable lines, she was close to undoing a lot of her earlier good work. Constantly denying that she said things despite being given video evidence - come on girl! Own your bitching.

• Fortunately for Gina, her opponent is Andrea - who is again given a golden chance to take down G, but ruins it due to her own unpleasant & cold personality. I was also rolling my eyes when she was pretend crying about having 5 nannies, & there's the issue! Gina knows when to turn off the CUNT & turn on the CHARM, but Andrea can't, because she's used to running roughshod over hired help/waiters/shop assistants etc. When she didn't immediately have the situation go her own way, she didn't know how to respond & get people on her side. The whole thing is like a takedown of a certain unpleasant rich lady personality type.

• I've slated FPG & KEVIN but Gina calling them BOGANS was snobby, classist & indefensible.

• I think Janet & Gina have an agreement off camera that it's all performance on screen & they're still good mates after it.

• Lydia - I can only assume she becomes a more dominant character later, as she's really only looked pretty, been a bit thick & talked about sex.

• Chyka might be forgettable & a total SWITZERLAND, but she's come away with dignity & the hottest husband, so she's winning in all areas other than reality TV personality.

• Most sensible personality at the reunion: Lydia's dog, Mr Figaro.

• Series 2 - LET'S GO! :disco:
 
I have to agree about Gina. She sometimes shows herself to a bit of a ARSE but it's instantly forgiveable because of her aura and her makeup.

Andrea however is just clueless. The way she THINKS the audience will be on her side just because she was actually sort of RIGHT about Gina (:eyes:) but had none of the character to back it up. It goes hand in hand with her cluelessness surrounding her self help book about how to cope with only 5 nannies or whatever it was.
 
Initial thoughts after 2 episodes of Series 2 (YES I KNOW :D )

• Gina seems aware that she might have been a bit HARSH at the reunion & has launched with a softer, although still iconic, persona. Again, an example of when to know to dial up the bitchiness & when to be a bit warmer. I bet the QUOTES will be unleashed as & when needed as the drama unfolds - a MASTERFUL grasp of reality TV.

• Janet has clearly decided to embrace the SHIT STIRRER role this time out & is already key in spreading rumours about the new girls. She seems to really care about her son, though, & I've come to quite like her. She knows being mean & bitchy is what the show is all about & it's all a bit of fun.

• Unlike Andrea, who I can imagine didn’t return as she knew Gina had the QUEEN BEE role & was a fan fave, & didn’t like the idea of being up against that. What a season, though. Also, no KEVIN, so far, long may it continue.

• Gamble - LOL. The weird childlike voice! The frozen botoxed face! The ancient husband that's one FRENZIED SEX SESH away from the grave! Already going to be a big character - enemies with Pettifleur, some SCANDALOUS whispers being spread by Janet, clearly dying to take down FPG by saying she doesn't believe in psychics. Liked the witch themed murder mystery party too.

• Pettifleur - WHAT. An utterly UNHINGED Sri Lankan lady who has no filter & speaks to MINIONS as one would to an INDENTURED SLAVE :D No idea what this "self help" book is about at all - she's obviously an awful person but I'm sure she'll be entertaining.

• Kindest & most patient character so far: Lydia's dog, Mr Figaro.
 
8 episodes in & there's been a rather TENSE dinner in the Philippines! :D

• Gina, as expected, steps up her game when asked & immediately holds her own when CHAOS DEMON Pettifleur decides to have a go at her. Gina's set with a different challenger this series. Whereas Andrea cared deeply about image, this time her enemy is an unfiltered LOON who just says & does what she likes :D The way she can steer any conversation back to herself is astonishing, her book sounds RIDICULOUS, & I did chortle at Gina damning her with the faint praise of reading it before immediately picking apart that a sentence began with because :disco: Pettifleur might be making a strong bid for the centre of attention so far, but my money is on Gina to win out this feud in the long run. Immensely entertaining television, of course.

• Gamble I've quite warmed to, despite her ABSURDNESS. She's made a wise choice early on to be Gina's ally, & the conversation she had with Pettifleur with P basically implying she was some sort of KEPT WHORE was so gobsmackingly RUDE that I was 100% Team Gamble. Pettifleur might make a great reality TV persona, but that sort of thing, & the DESPICABLE way she speaks to service staff show up what an AWFUL person she likely is in real life.

• I thought Chyka might be IN DANGER GIRL after not getting involved with any of the drama in Series 1 but she's now successfully carved out a niche as the warm & kind hub of the group. Along with the nice house & HOT, game for a laugh husband, I've spent this season wanting to BE her. She almost even made FPG seem likeable in the stripper scene but FPG undid all that later at the dinner.

• Lydia is slowly stepping up her game. She's finally realising that she's going to need to give more than just pretty - so we've had a bit of getting involved in the gossip; outrageous flirting at poker with cricket legend Shane Warne (DEAD NOW, of course); bringing a gift for her housekeeper Joanna's parents to the Philippines in a hilariously awkward scene of condescending - Joanna might be "like a daughter" to OUR LYD, but WAS SHE FUCK letting her fly out to see Mum & Dad herself - there's dishes to be done girl :D
 
Bless her. Not the show for her.

Our Lydia really pulls one out of the bag for season three, mind. I kind of want to watch it again now.
 
Susie had some moments. Her best was the phenomenal line to Lydia: "You came to my wedding! IT WAS AT THE HYATT!"
 
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