A Saturday two years in the making

I had a rat in da kitchen a couple of years ago. Hideous experience.
 
Raining On Me said:
There is a RAT in my kitchen :gross: This has never happened before. I think it came in yesterday and after much bravery I have found a hole next to a pipe where it clearly got in. It's fucking HUGE, like a mouse x20.

I have been in a battle now for nearly 6 hours where I've shrieked, flapped my hands in a manly fashion, and been continuously outsmarted by this beast.

I tried shoving it out the door with a broom, and it squealed loudly and JUMPED towards me. Every other time it avoids the exit at all costs and keeps running back and forth between the hole in the wall, a hole in the back of the washing machine (!) and the freezer. Then, 15 minutes later, it comes out again, taunting me with its infuriatingly cute face. All day.

Mr RoM is on his way home on a mission to kill it which frankly I can't face. I did nearly drop a pumpkin on it but I just CAN'T.

I'm only bothering to relay this because I'm stood in the kitchen keeping watch. It's the first day of my week off and we're having people around for Eurovision ANY MINUTE NOW, FFS :gross: :cry:
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get the hoover out!
 
I think the thing to when encountering a giant rat is to wash it with a hose.

gqs1avj8_giant-rat-in-mexico-_625x300_24_September_20.jpg
 
Raining On Me said:
What did you DO?

OK other half is in and has just tied a huge knife to the end of a broom handle and is waiting. What the fuck.
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Put poison under the kitchen units.

Honestly I SHIT MYSELF when I walked in and saw it standing on the top of our dishes.
 
Raining On Me said:
There is a RAT in my kitchen :gross: This has never happened before. I think it came in yesterday and after much bravery I have found a hole next to a pipe where it clearly got in. It's fucking HUGE, like a mouse x20.

I have been in a battle now for nearly 6 hours where I've shrieked, flapped my hands in a manly fashion, and been continuously outsmarted by this beast.

I tried shoving it out the door with a broom, and it squealed loudly and JUMPED towards me. Every other time it avoids the exit at all costs and keeps running back and forth between the hole in the wall, a hole in the back of the washing machine (!) and the freezer. Then, 15 minutes later, it comes out again, taunting me with its infuriatingly cute face. All day.

Mr RoM is on his way home on a mission to kill it which frankly I can't face. I did nearly drop a pumpkin on it but I just CAN'T.

I'm only bothering to relay this because I'm stood in the kitchen keeping watch. It's the first day of my week off and we're having people around for Eurovision ANY MINUTE NOW, FFS :gross: :cry:
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Rats are intelligent creatures. If you want to shove it out of the door you have to first cover up the holes where it keeps escaping to because it's already learned that it's safe in there so that's where it'll run to.
 
Raining On Me said:
He's actually got it. Oh my fucking god this is awful. I can FUCKING HEAR IT

Surely there there are BETTER WAYS THAN THIS. Actually want to die. We are going to hell. I am going to hell
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this made me sad. :(

I've just youtubed 'rat dying nose' and have promptly cleared my search history should some look and suspect sadism.
 
What is a rat's natural enemy? Whatever it is, dress up as said creature.
 
Floppet said:
Rats are intelligent creatures. If you want to shove it out of the door you have to first cover up the holes where it keeps escaping to because it's already learned that it's safe in there so that's where it'll run to.
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I don't even know what to say. I didn't because I wasn't sure if I was blocking it in.

But when it was under the freezer...I could have. I didn't fucking think. Not that it would have worked for definite. It could have run between all the hiding places for ages. I have a dog and I was worried if it bit her. I tried enticing it outside for hours.

I didn't expect him to walk in and do that so easily. He bought a poison trap which I didn't want either.

I can't deal with this.
 
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Raining On Me said:
I don't even know what to say. I didn't because I wasn't sure if I was blocking it in.

But when it was under the freezer...I could have. I didn't fucking think. Not that it would have worked for definite. It could have run between all the hiding places for ages. I have a dog and I was worried if it bit her. I tried enticing it outside for hours.

I didn't expect him to walk in and do that so easily. He bought a poison trap which I didn't want either.

I can't deal with this.
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At the end of the day it's just a rat. It wasn't your pet rat, it was a dirty vermin that could've been carrying all kinds of germs and could have hurt your little dog. You spent six hours trying to remove it humanely, it chose not to go so the rat was actually the architect of its own demise.

Now pour yourself a stiff drink and get the place ready for your Eurovision party!
 
win_the_game said:
You pair sound even more psychopathic than Rachey and Mandy.
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How can that not be more humane than poison though. How can it not. Is it psychopathic to use poison?

I told him to buy a humane trap and we would release it but he didn't. I tried my best for hours to get it out.
 
Raining On Me said:
Fuck this day, I don't want to watch Eurovision now. It'll be something shit like Italy winning anyway. I'm actually a bit tearful.

This is pathetic, I feel like MAXINE CARR
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:(

Pour yourself a LARGE GLASS OF WINE, make a one off donation to the Starlight Trust to give another rat a BRIGHT START IN LIFE, and enjoy Eurovision with your mates.

It's what the rat would have wanted.
 
Well I’ve had a lovely day driving around the south of England listening to former Eurovision hits, occasionally stopping at a charity shop (six albums bought today) and, yes, ending the day balls deep in some slut at a services on the A22.

I’ve bought six bottles of champagne and I intend to be drunk very, very shortly,
 
Raining On Me said:
How can that not be more humane than poison though. How can it not. Is it psychopathic to use poison?

I told him to buy a humane trap and we would release it but he didn't. I tried my best for hours to get it out.
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Actually, I don't think you're allowed to release them once they have been caught in a humane trap. They're vermin, so I think that legally you have to finish them off.
 
Sheena said:
Well I’ve had a lovely day driving around the south of England listening to former Eurovision hits, occasionally stopping at a charity shop (six albums bought today) and, yes, ending the day balls deep in some slut at a services on the A22.

I’ve bought six bottles of champagne and I intend to be drunk very, very shortly,
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SIX!
 
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