CHARLOTTE CHURCH DITCHES DEODERANT

Petula Clark said to be on the war path, after Church's whiff reached her home during an episode of Oz.

The Downtown songstress said "It was just getting to an anal scene and the whiff of fish and must just hit me".

She has apparently hired a bulldozer.
 
North Korea sent troops to deploy potpourri across Wales to mask the stench, leader Kim Jong-un admitted in a speech on Saturday
 
Noel Edmonds makes pledge to NEVER HAVE ANAL SEX WITH CHARLOTTE CHURCH AGAIN until she AMENDS her ANTIPERSPIRANT
 
In unrelated news it's been confirmed that J-Llo is set to retrain as a plasterer.
 
NATO bombs all churches in Charlotte, North Carolina, "just to be sure".

It has offered a gift bag of Charlotte Tilbury cosmetics to the Trump government as recompense.
 
Charlotte Perrelli changes her name to Shaggy to escape accusations of being a filthy bitch.
 
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Charlotte potatoes have been approached for a comment.
 
Cherlu and Baba unavailable for comment but seen spraying Spice Girls sponsored Impulse body spray on a flag of Wales. Unknown if this incident is related.
 
Princess Charlotte, reportedly unfazed by recent drama surrounding her name, calls ‘all Charlottes VILE anyway!’
 
Exclusive Breaking News: Charlotte Church has informed the Cardiff Echo that if Kylie's Xmas reaches #1, she will wear deodorant again. Charlotte then questioned if Lynx do a female anti-perspirant.
 
I understand from the topic title that Charlotte Church isn't wearing DEODORENT anymore, but will she ever wear DEODORANT again?
 
THIS JUST IN: Trump set to sue Church for £18.50 in world first "odoriferous litigation" claim.
 
NEWS just IN from TMZ: Charlotte Church to perform fan classic 'Moodswings' at the BBC New Years Eve show featuring Ronan and Louise. Without DEODORANT Unless 'Moodswings' is streamed 100k between now and then.
 
Sheena said:
I understand from the topic title that Charlotte Church isn't wearing DEODORENT anymore, but will she ever wear DEODORANT again?
Click to expand...
Everything we know is stated in this topic.

Why is all this so important? Analysis upcoming.
 
UK must stop ‘dragging heels’ over DEODERANT threat, intelligence watchdog warns.

The warning follows revelations that Chinese spies are encouraging citizens to embrace repugnancy in a bid to destabilise UK national security.
 
Lynx Africa blame drop in sales of their AFRICA range on Charlotte Church. 'Her fans are following suit' claim the company - 'Charlotte Church is still very influential and may mean job cuts in the new year'
 
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