Cunt of March 2019 - Shortlist

[cwej]

WHO WILL JOIN OUR CUNTY 4: R KELLY, TIM MARTIN, CHRISTOPHER CHOPE AND SHAMIMA BEGUM?

For the first time ever I'm allowing you to vote for your TOP TWO following public demand! You have 3 days to get your votes in

We need two more for the grand final and your choices are:

ANDREA LEADSOM

She may have lost the leadership race to ol' Tezza, but can she secure a place in the 2019 Cunt final before May does? One of many Brexit related cunts this month.

ARLENE FOSTER

If Nick Clegg was a cunt for getting into bed with the Tories, then surely Ms Foster must be even worse for taking a billion pounds for her party and then fucking the Tories over royally. Or maybe that makes her less of one. You decide.

BORIS JOHNSON

Andrea Leadsom, nearly leader of the country. Boris Johnson, possible future leader of the country. We have the highest respect for people that nearly lead our country here. Another Brexit cunt.

DAVID CAMERON

The Brexit cunt to end all Brexit cunts perhaps? He never even wanted this bloody thing...! But he's the one who got the ball rolling.

DONALD TRUMP

Still not in the end of year list, but surely a shoe-in for the Second Chance round if we never vote him through... Not sure what he's done this time but apparently today he said his Dad was born in Germany which was another one of his bare-faced lies.

KINDACOOL

Is he though? If he makes the final, surely he needs to be renamed to KindaCunt?

MICHAEL JACKSON

It's taken a long time to get to where we are now on this man. Evil or misunderstood? You decide.

MICHAEL JACKSON'S DEFENDERS

Are they worse or better than him? They received slightly more nominations to make this shortlist.

NIGEL FARAGE

Or is this the Brexit super cunt? I just can't decide. Are the Brexit cunts going to cancel each other out?

THERESA MAY

If there's one thing this lady will be remembered for it is Brexit. Churchill winning World War II; Cameron Pig fucking; May Brexit. What a legacy...!

 

[octophone]

Part of me thinks Arlene Foster has out-Toried the Tories and wangled a massive amount of cash for doing absolutely nothing of value to them so she's kinda of part-cunt, part-legend. But the latter is a very small part and she would still be rounded up to 100% cunt.

 

[dmlaw]

It is causing me actual physical pain to only be able vote for two out of Boris Johnson, Nigel Farage and Theresa May.

Remember everyone, Michael Jackson may have fucked a couple of dozen kids but the Brexiteers are trying to fuck eleven million.

 

[K.C.]

Finally getting the airtime I deserve.

Boris Johnson is one of the ugliest creatures I've ever seen. In and out.

 

[octophone]

It is causing me actual physical pain to only be able vote for two out of Boris Johnson, Nigel Farage and Theresa May.

Remember everyone, Michael Jackson may have fucked a couple of dozen kids but the Brexiteers are trying to fuck eleven million.

Hey, we're into April. I expect Johnson and Farage in particular to reach whole new levels of advance cuntery before we get even as far as the 12th.

 

[cwej]

I have always said that in the event of a tie, the deciding factor is who had most nominations in the longlist, just in case anyone was wondering...

 

[cwej]

There is less than 1 day to vote... any more for any more?

 

[cwej]

So after the first quarter of the year we've got a final looking like this:

R Kelly
Tim Martin
Christopher Chope
Shamima Begum
Boris Johnson
Theresa May

That's two really big guns making the final this month - who will you nominate for April. I'll give it a week before I open voting again...