Do you worry about getting older?

I

Inner Smile

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It's all a good laugh when you're young, 20s 30s and even 40s (although it's not easy!) but I dread getting past 50 and beyond. I know a lot of my family will be gone then and my main worry is how fast years seem to go by. I hope I marry and can just settle with someone, it's all I really want to be honest
 
There is nothing you can do about time. There is no pain in the present, only the past and the future.

Focus on what you have and what you can control now, not what might or might not be, or what has or hasnt happened.
 
I'm much more likely to worry about not getting older FAST ENOUGH. I've always enjoyed ageing. I've never understood people who long for their younger years. Then again, I haven't entered my 40s yet so maybe I'll change my mind.
 
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but on a serious note - yes, kind of all the time! I constantly feel pressure about where I should be in my life, what I should have achieved, the fact that I've gone backwards in my career, the fact I haven't bought a house, don't have a partner. it's a lot! I try to be calm and rational about it, I'm only 34, but some days it's difficult not to FREAK OUT!

getting older itself isn't so much a fear in that I think 40s and 50s seem pretty much prime. but when I get there I'd love to have a lot more ticked off. I think I should at least find a husband while I'm still young and fuckable and don't need a facelift yet!
 
Jark said:
but on a serious note - yes, kind of all the time! I constantly feel pressure about where I should be in my life, what I should have achieved, the fact that I've gone backwards in my career, the fact I haven't bought a house, don't have a partner. it's a lot! I try to be calm and rational about it, I'm only 34, but some days it's difficult not to FREAK OUT!

getting older itself isn't so much a fear in that I think 40s and 50s seem pretty much prime. but when I get there I'd love to have a lot more ticked off. I think I should at least find a husband while I'm still young and fuckable and don't need a facelift yet!
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For the record, it's definitely not you because I think you're super datable. Gay dating is just awwwwful.
 
I actually don't like ageing much. I noticed crows feet the other day. A lifetime of booze, fags and narcotics, guaranteed I wasn't going to stay young and pretty.

I'm pleased I got married to a great guy, before I got too old and that we're in a very happy marriage. It makes it all that much more tolerable.

That aside, my memory is absolutely appalling and it keeps getting worse. My health hasn't really recovered after covid. These are the invisible scars life leaves for us.

Seeing my parents ailing and knowing I'll be their age in 25 years and 25 years ago I was a pretty party twink, is quite horrifying.

But I can't do shit about it and I know that, but it is shit.
 
Its not like its a big surprise were thrust into a decaying meat bag from day one, just embrace it
 
Yeah I guess I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror every now and then and think FUCK I’m old, but I cant do anything about that.

I am still embracing life as an exciting adventure, I refuse to give up chasing dreams.
 
I felt much more trepid in the run up to the awful 4-0 then I feel after it. Once you've passed certain milestones, you kind of shrug and accept it.

In prior years, I definitely had a sense of DOOM and anxiety linked to what Jark touched on; the sense that one is not where one should be in life. But I've recently made much more peace with it, and a lot of that was stepping back and realising that most of my "missed targets" like not having a partner and kids were actually just GENERAL SOCIETAL EXPECTATIONS rather than anything I truly wanted for myself. I'm much more relaxed, accepting and HAPPY with my selfish boring obligation-free life.

The physical side of aging is obviously still rather SCARY, but I think I'm on the same page as Star - it's the idea of my parents becoming elderly that I'm dreading more. I can accept my own body falling apart, but I don't want to watch it happen to my loved ones.
 
Don't Shoat Me Santa said:
I felt much more trepid in the run up to the awful 4-0 then I feel after it. Once you've passed certain milestones, you kind of shrug and accept it.

In prior years, I definitely had a sense of DOOM and anxiety linked to what Jark touched on; the sense that one is not where one should be in life. But I've recently made much more peace with it, and a lot of that was stepping back and realising that most of my "missed targets" like not having a partner and kids were actually just GENERAL SOCIETAL EXPECTATIONS rather than anything I truly wanted for myself. I'm much more relaxed, accepting and HAPPY with my selfish boring obligation-free life.

The physical side of aging is obviously still rather SCARY, but I think I'm on the same page as Star - it's the idea of my parents becoming elderly that I'm dreading more. I can accept my own body falling apart, but I don't want to watch it happen to my loved ones.
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Very much all of this.

My dad turned 70 this year, and touch wood he's still in good health, as is my mum. But you do get that creeping thought around this time of year of... well, there might not be many more of these left. And then you go into the selfish doom spiral of what the implications might be if/when something does happen which means they start to lose their independence.

I'm taking them on a road trip around Ireland next year for my 40th. We haven't had a proper family holiday together since I was a teenager, and it feels like an opportune time.
 
I'm also increasingly of the view that constantly looking back and bemoaning how things didn't turn out, or how much better things seemed in the past, is a really wasteful and indulgent exercise. You can't turn back the clock, you made the decisions you made at the time and now here you are. Make peace with it and move forwards.
 
I turn 40 in 2027 and I don't worry about getting old, especially if I can pass for 24 according to one of my colleagues at work.

My mum turns 70 in 2027 and she's very much on the 'if I'm still around' mantra when we talk about doing something for it. She's already out lived my grandma by five years.
 
The parent thing didn’t really hit me until my mom was discussing getting her last colonoscopy and said “May as well it done as it might be the last one” and I was like oh shit it could very well be. That was a wake up for sure.

I’ve gone back and forth with my own mortality. I never thought I’d live to see 40 but here I am at 50 still thriving. I don’t feel old (and don’t really act it I guess) but the body is definitely not what it used to be health wise.

My daughter is grown, married and seemingly happy so if that’s my biggest accomplishment in life I’ll take it ❤️
 
SilVoR Bells said:
I'm taking them on a road trip around Ireland next year for my 40th. We haven't had a proper family holiday together since I was a teenager, and it feels like an opportune time.
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This is lovely and I definitely encourage doing it whilst your parents are in good nick.

We did a similar thing earlier this year - a big expensive family holiday for the first time since my siblings and I were kids. And whilst I was initially guilt-tripped into it, in the end it was lovely and I'm now very grateful we did it before THINGS get in the way. They tried a holiday once with their own parents, and it wasn't quite the same for them as they'd left it so late they were dealing with 80-somethings with dodgy hips and deafness. It tipped it more to being a CHORE than a JOY.
 
I do think Mr L being 7 years older than me has made me come to terms with my own age a lot more. I was 26 and him 33 when we met, so whenever he's hit those big age milestones, I've had several years to get my head around it myself, and I've had time to convince myself 'it's not that old'.
 
I'm glad I took my mum away for loads of city breaks. I did it first later in the year my dad died, and have done Rome, Florence, Venice, Barcelona, Nice, Lisbon, Vienna, Krakow and a lot in the UK. COVID stopped us, and since then her mobility has been so poor (she's had a hip replacement cancelled 4 times already for various reasons), or I'd have done more. Assuming she can have the operation, I'm not sure realistically how well she'll recover to be able to do it again.
 
Joseph said:
The parent thing didn’t really hit me until my mom was discussing getting her last colonoscopy and said “May as well it done as it might be the last one” and I was like oh shit it could very well be. That was a wake up for sure.

I’ve gone back and forth with my own mortality. I never thought I’d live to see 40 but here I am at 50 still thriving. I don’t feel old (and don’t really act it I guess) but the body is definitely not what it used to be health wise.

My daughter is grown, married and seemingly happy so if that’s my biggest accomplishment in life I’ll take it ❤️
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Respict g 😁👊🏼👍 your awasom g yooo i love be 13 allso love be 900 🤔🤣🤛🏽😀

Big ligers kool
 
I took my parents (Mum late sixties and Dad mid seventies) to Iceland back in February for a few days as they've always wanted to go but I knew they never would get round to it. Was a bit concerned beforehand as was the longest had been away with them since I was a teenager. Had a wonderful time and so glad I went. Highlights being seeing only once did my Dad and boyfriend clash and that was at the airport on way home and after they each went off on a huff was very quickly forgotten. :D
 
Fa la la la la la la lolly said:
I do think Mr L being 7 years older than me has made me come to terms with my own age a lot more. I was 26 and him 33 when we met, so whenever he's hit those big age milestones, I've had several years to get my head around it myself, and I've had time to convince myself 'it's not that old'.
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Oh seven and half year age gap for me and never thought of it that way but so true :D
 
SilVoR Bells said:
My dad turned 70 this year, and touch wood he's still in good health, as is my mum. But you do get that creeping thought around this time of year of... well, there might not be many more of these left.
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My dad turned 90 this year and so I couldn’t help but automatically think what a young whippersnapper your dad sounds being 70. :D

My main goal now is getting him to 100 so that he can walk around the garden a few times and I can rake in the cash :disco:

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