Eurovision 2022: Semi Final TWO (20:00 BST)

[Lucille]

Mika technically handsome but completely unfuckable.

 

[Nancy]

Has anyone ever died on stage at Eurovision?

 

[ManicKangaroo]

Now this is more like it

 

[Mother Superior]

Has anyone ever died on stage at Eurovision?

Jemini

 

[straightorbroken]

In seconds I know the song is terrible, but that there might be flesh. It's almost like they know.

 

[Ellie]

This is giving me Gary Glitter vibes

 

[RS]

Please no more lisping.

 

[AlgoAlex]

Dire

 

[Christian]

Not much actual song is there?

 

[Nancy]

I love how gay this Eurovision is!

 

[Sheena]

This is nonsense but count me in

 

[Star]

I love how gay this Eurovision is!

I was just thinking the same!

 

[GNL]

More shots of topless guitarist please.

 

[RS]

Bring back Serhat!

 

[lolly]

Will we get a good look at his arse or not?

 

[AGinAg (37)]

This has grown on me no end.

 

[straightorbroken]

This is basically Mechanical Animals era Maz Manson. Kind of.

 

[dmlaw]

I hope he doesn’t get tossed off.

 

[Nancy]

This is brilliant! It has to go through!

 

[Christian]

Quite the spectacle

 

[ButterTart]

This is the high point of Eurovision in general.

 

[Sheena]

This needs to be in the final too. Amazing.

 

[win_the_game]

That's got to be in the final surely

 

[lolly]

Like Hatari meets The Darkness via Slade

 

[straightorbroken]

No arse or bulge shots? What a waste of a terrible song.

 

[dmlaw]

And now back to Mika because it takes ages to get the bull off stage.

 

[Christian]

He's covering it so well

 

[win_the_game]

Mika love you're not meant to admit you're filling time

 

[AGinAg (37)]

So much fun.

 

[GNL]

Did the stage break?

 

[ButterTart]

Excruciating

 

[Lucille]

 

[straightorbroken]

Is this really Mika or just Philip Schofield with a spray tan?

 

[Marina Salty]

And now back to Mika because it takes ages to get the bull off stage.

And to bring in the aussie prop

 

[FetchFugly]

Dreadful but sort of brilliant by the end.

They could surely have done better in filming the bronco though.

 

[win_the_game]

Christ. From Mike to Australia.

 

[Nancy]

Scott and Rylan are so much fun together!

 

[Devil]

Just waddled in to say Alessandro or what his name is would get it ANY way

 

[Music]

Ugh not this Australian cunt

 

[lolly]

I've only just realised that Mika looks a bit like the man who took my cherry, and I feel dirty.