Moopyvision 2010-2019 Round 7: Belarus, Finland & The Netherlands

6th: Trintje Oosterhuis - Walk Along (90pts)

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I'll tell you what, as sad as I was that this went out in the semis, I was instantly cheered up when I realised I wouldn't have to keep trying to spell that fucking name on the ESC Insight newsletters anymore. :zombie:

I've kind of said everything I have to say about this already. The formula was essentially correct - big local star, nice song that played to her vocal strengths and wasn't straining too hard to be 'Eurovision'. Then came THAT staging.

If it's possible to imagine, it genuinely was even worse in rehearsals. Not only with that 'The Crows Have Eyes III: The Crowening' getup, but if memory serves the backing singers were inexplicably dressed as teapots. It was as if everybody involved in the production actively hated her.

SAD

2 x 10 (Win The Game, Superstylin)
1 x 1 (Kevin)
 
If the OG3NE story had been true, at least it would have secured good marks from the Hungarian jury.
 
Douwe Bob was a fine looking thing, tattoos and all, but "Slow Down" epitomises the worst of current era Dutch.
 
5th: Sieneke - Ik ben verliefd (102pts)

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The Netherlands may be a country of virulent racists, but on the plus side they also have an enduring affection for hot garbage like this, so personally I'm willing to forgive. :disco:

I love that of all the shameful Dutch flops of the 21st century, this one was apparently the biggest chart hit. She seems to have carved out a genuine career from it too. I highly recommend this jaunty number in which her styling suggests her age could be anywhere from 17 to 57.

Now that they've got their long-awaited 6th win, I kinda hope the Dutch relax a little and send her again.

1 x 12 (sewerynsven)
2 x 0 (Dark Carnival, Superstylin')
 
Alla said:
God, I gave that a 1, everything about Paradise Oskar is awful. It doesn't help a female eurofan that I detest (surely VoR and Kala know her, but no names) was obsessed with him, and ended up fucking with him during the contest. Disgusting.
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OMG! :D I know EXACTLY who this is and all about it. They actually dated for good while after Eurovision that year. Maybe a year and a half.
 
Kalabaliken said:
OMG! :D I know EXACTLY who this is and all about it. They actually dated for good while after Eurovision that year. Maybe a year and a half.
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Not that I like him at all, but poor guy ending up with such a repulsive 2faced individual.
 
4th: O'G3NE - Lights and Shadows (120pts)

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Notoriously antisemitic vocal harmony trio O'G3NE had long been on the Eurovision radar after success at the Junior contest and victory on The Voice of Holland, during which they went viral with a note perfect rendition of Wilson Phillips 'Hold On'.

Not ones to shy away from their strengths, they essentially changed the words to that Bridesmaids classic and coasted to 11th place glory on the back of it.

Even I find this a bit REDUCTIVE, to be honest. Lovely vocals, and nice to finally see Sarah Dawn Finer on the Eurovision stage, but talk about taking the path of least resistance!

1 x 12 (Kalabaliken)
4 x 3 (Ag, Jacques, Dark Carnival, sewerynsven)
 
What’s this about O’GENE (not O’G3ENE - they changed the spelling before Eurovision) being anti-Semitic?
 
3rd: Duncan Laurence - Arcade (158pts)

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Another winner down! Where IS Duncan these days, anyway? I will never understand why modern Eurovision winners seem to so consistently squander whatever momentum the show grants them. ONE single release in the YEAR since this was first released! The man makes Loreen look like a workaholic...

ANYWAY, this is of course a thing of tender beauty and a deserving victor even if we'd all rather have seen the Norwegian Joikers or the sexy gay Italian do it.

I remain deeply bitter that I first heard this while away from my laptop and missed the chance to stick a tenner on while the Dutch were at 35/1. :(

3 x 12 (VoR, Superstylin, Kevin)
1 x 3 (Win The Game)
 
Guys, I'm 100% making it up about the OG3NE girls being antisemites. I was just running with the 'All Dutch people are racists' bit.

Forgive, I've been doing this for many hours and may or may not have gone slightly BARMY.
 
Arcade is the most generic winner of the last decade. Totally undeserving. It should have been Soldi in retrospect.
 
Kalabaliken said:
What’s this about O’GENE (not O’G3ENE - they changed the spelling before Eurovision) being anti-Semitic?
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This might be another sign that the people who are catching up with the thread don't actually read VoR's delightful write ups.
 
VoR said:
Guys, I'm 100% making it up about the OG3NE girls being antisemites. I was just running with the 'All Dutch people are racists' bit.

Forgive, I've been doing this for many hours and may or may not have gone slightly BARMY.
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Not exactly something you should be joking about really, especially as a Labour supporter.
 
Apparently Duncan had a whole album ready to go that’s had to be scrapped due to record label politics.
 
I'm quite nervous now. Birds is a great song but Calm After The Storm is probably my very favourite from the decade.
 
Penelope said:
I heard the Dutch recently selected KALABALIKEN as their 2020 entry to really SEW UP the ANTI-SEMITE VOTE :o
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The sad thing is that he didn't even vote for himself on account of the 'disgusting male vocals'.
 
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