Put the icing on Saturday

Well I resent it out of principal and the fact my brother has ridiculous amounts of money. And a £25 voucher would mean a lot to me
 
Rachey The Red Nosed Reindeer said:
No, more the fact that he expects things from me but doesn't return it I guess.
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But he's not expecting you to buy for him - just the children?

Sorry, I'm not trying to be difficult, and although I've said I'm in the same position, in terms of disposable income I'm in a far more fortunate situation than my siblings, which is very different from you. With my sister in particular, I'd much rather she spent whatever she was going to spend on me on her children. But again, his children will be in a very different position than hers.

I just think that if it all does get heated and he gets confrontational, you need to be sure about what your issue is. Because if emotions run high and it's painted as you not wanting to buy for children at Christmas, it could be easy to paint you as the bad guy.
 
lolly said:
But he's not expecting you to buy for him - just the children?

Sorry, I'm not trying to be difficult, and although I've said I'm in the same position, in terms of disposable income I'm in a far more fortunate situation than my siblings, which is very different from you. With my sister in particular, I'd much rather she spent whatever she was going to spend on me on her children. But again, his children will be in a very different position than hers.

I just think that if it all does get heated and he gets confrontational, you need to be sure about what your issue is. Because if emotions run high and it's painted as you not wanting to buy for children at Christmas, it could be easy to paint you as the bad guy.
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I think my issue is, these kids have everything. So the money I spend on them means a lot to me, but to them it's nothing. Personally I'd rather give it to charity or spend it on my mum who also doesn't have much.

The fact he expects me to buy for his children, knowing full well I dont have much money, yet he has.no intention of getting me anything just bothers me.

Even a token "the kids made your his bracelet" would mean a lot to me.

I don't care he has money, he works hard for it. But I equally work hard for my money and to me, £10 is a lot, whereas to him it's pennies.

He can't even be bothered to think of anything to buy me, he's already said "I never know what to get you so let's not bother". What he means is, he can't be arsed to put thought into anything so let's not bother.

I've always put thought into gifts. He can't even be arsed to get me a voucher for coffee in a local cafe.

I'm rambling because I'm angry and not fully concentrating so this may not make much sense.
 
Rachey The Red Nosed Reindeer said:
I think my issue is, these kids have everything. So the money I spend on them means a lot to me, but to them it's nothing. Personally I'd rather give it to charity or spend it on my mum who also doesn't have much.

The fact he expects me to buy for his children, knowing full well I dont have much money, yet he has.no intention of getting me anything just bothers me.

Even a token "the kids made your his bracelet" would mean a lot to me.

I don't care he has money, he works hard for it. But I equally work hard for my money and to me, £10 is a lot, whereas to him it's pennies.

He can't even be bothered to think of anything to buy me, he's already said "I never know what to get you so let's not bother". What he means is, he can't be arsed to put thought into anything so let's not bother.

I've always put thought into gifts. He can't even be arsed to get me a voucher for coffee in a local cafe.

I'm rambling because I'm angry and not fully concentrating so this may not make much sense.
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No it all makes sense. And it's family - it's emotional.

Why not make a point and buy a charity gift like when you buy a farming family in Burundi a goat or the like in the children's names? That way you're contributing to charity if you'd rather do that, and can make a 'well, you already have everything you need' point.

Like a lot of family stuff I don't think there is an easy answer though. I may be inclined just to suck it up and bide your time until they all reach age 18.
 
lolly said:
No it all makes sense. And it's family - it's emotional.

Why not make a point and buy a charity gift like when you buy a farming family in Burundi a goat or the like in the children's names? That way you're contributing to charity if you'd rather do that, and can make a 'well, you already have everything you need' point.

Like a lot of family stuff I don't think there is an easy answer though. I may be inclined just to suck it up and bide your time until they all reach age 18.
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Oh that's a good idea, I could adopt them a donkey at the donkey sanctuary!
 
For those that don’t know London neighbourhoods this could not be more OFF BRAND.
 
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