Thursday's apes have lost 95% of their value.

[octophone]

HOWDY

 

[GNL]

Terrible news for ape-ficionado Madonna.

 

[Diddy]

I hate every ape I see
From chimpan A to chimpan Z

 

[Sheena]

MORNING!

Just putting the final touches to my new work website and avoiding doing anything to do with my current job.

FOURTEEN DAYS TIL I'M ON THE BREADLINE

 

[Dark Carnival]

Working meeting in Athens going swimmingly. Last night two important managers followed us out to a club, that turned out to be a STRIP CLUB. Both left instantly and went back to the hotel.

 

[Diddy]

WELL, SHIT

My branch school will indeed close down at the end of July. Most people and students transferring to the one I’d rather go to, but presumably others are not. And since I have an extra role that links me to the school with loads of kids, I’m worried that’ll mean I’m going there.

I’ve told my boss what I want, but HQ is decided, he will just pass my request on.

Bad feeling about this

Don’t want to eat dinner now

 

[Sheena]

ALL OF MOOPY ON THE BREADLINE BY CHRISTMAS

 

[funky]

Well count me in because my car lease is up at the very point when CAR PRICES ARE THROUGH THE FUCKING ROOF (like everything else) and now I have to pay over the odds to keep it or pay over the odds for a new lease.

I think I’m gonna use my savings which I massively begrudge using even though this is EXACTLY what savings are for

I like the money staying in the bank

 

[octophone]

Star transferring the funds to the Cayman Islands as we speak...

 

[Sheena]

I need a new car. I've taken out a stupidly big £25k loan for it and I still can't get anywhere near what I want. I need something BIG and RELIABLE enough to look after an 81 year old in a wheelchair.

Albeit that earlier today I did realise how as a 44 year old I'm going to start struggling soon, given the state of me fannying about trying to get out of a colleague's sporty BMW this morning

 

[funky]

I need a new car. I've taken out a stupidly big £25k loan for it and I still can't get anywhere near what I want. I need something BIG and RELIABLE enough to look after an 81 year old in a wheelchair.

Albeit that earlier today I did realise how as a 44 year old I'm going to start struggling soon, given the state of me fannying about trying to get out of a colleague's sporty BMW this morning

Have you started GROANING when you get out of a chair yet?

We need PUTTING DOWN

 

[lolly]

The involuntary noises which come out of me getting up on a morning really are something. I ought to record them and send them to @octophone and see what she could come up with.

 

[big ron]

I'm deffos in the habit of making excessive DAD NOISES now. I can still get out of coupe with grace though.

 

[floppet]

I only have a little Corsa and recently when I get out of it I have to turn sideways on the seat and put both of my feet on the floor outside the car then lean on the seat and steering wheel to get myself out. Going to have to change my nickname from middle-aged girl racer to old bint with the wrong type of car.

 

[Indie]

My father-in-law just died.

Don't hug react me Moopy, this is the best news since he married a Philippino and sodded off there for the rest of his days.

 

[Kate]

My father-in-law just died.

Don't hug react me Moopy, this is the best news since he married a Philippino and sodded off there for the rest of his days.

OK. But how is Mrs Indie?

 

[Indie]

OK. But how is Mrs Indie?

Sad for <5 minutes.

 

[octophone]

The thing I've found over the years is that it is impossible to call how grief works. If someone's death is a genuine relief to their relatives, then that's how it is and no-one gets to tell them otherwise.

I consider myself fortunate always to have felt sad when my relatives and other loved ones have passed on.

 

[Indie]

It's difficult, but it's hard to mourn the passing of a selfish and abusive person with no care in the world other than themselves.

The only tricky bit now is how to stop the state pension from flowing into the account of someone who clearly has no interest in co-operating with being cut off from that money.

 

[Star]

I need a new car. I've taken out a stupidly big £25k loan for it and I still can't get anywhere near what I want. I need something BIG and RELIABLE enough to look after an 81 year old in a wheelchair.

Albeit that earlier today I did realise how as a 44 year old I'm going to start struggling soon, given the state of me fannying about trying to get out of a colleague's sporty BMW this morning

I love our Ateca! Immense boot space and drives like a dream.

 

[Star]

My father-in-law just died.

Don't hug react me Moopy, this is the best news since he married a Philippino and sodded off there for the rest of his days.

He only went out there recently didn't he?

 

[Indie]

He only went out there recently didn't he?

18 months ago maybe?

To be honest I'm surprised he made it on the plane. He couldn't walk 5 foot.