Wednesday has a nice conversation about puppies

Operation "disguise myself as ButterTart's dog" starts NOW
Be warned, I’m quite on the ball. It took me less than three months to figure out that au pair who came to me for work experience was actually just Zu Klara in a shawl. The alarm bells starting ringing as soon as I realised I don’t have any children.
 
Mr F has one of those Shower Feet things that stick to the bottom of the bath with suction cups as he can't bend down to wash his feet and can't balance on one leg to save his life. I only tried it once and cannot abide the scratchy bristles on the sole of my foot.
 
Unless they're actually caked in mud for some reason I just kind of assumed the stomping about in the soapy run off from the shower did the trick? My feet don't smell or anything so I doubt it needs more than that.
That's what I do. I've never thought to actually wash my feet. Maybe I should
 
I don't wash them either unless I've been walking around barefoot outside or something.

Most of the time I only wash face, pits and bits. Bit more if I've been running.
 
I don’t think I’ve ever thought to wash my feet :D
 
i wash them every time i'm in the shower. i lift, soap, and fear for my life.
i also brush the tops about once a week and use pumice once/twice a month on the soles.
 
I've just had a shower and its pits and bits for me, I don't even use soap on my face.
 
Be warned, I’m quite on the ball. It took me less than three months to figure out that au pair who came to me for work experience was actually just Zu Klara in a shawl. The alarm bells starting ringing as soon as I realised I don’t have any children.

:D You could at least TAG me so I know I’m being talked about :side-eye:

Anyway I didn’t fancy it in the end when the tight twat revealed that the T&Cs didn’t include FREE PIE
 
Feet are fucking DISGUSTING. Years ago Pre Mr K I met a guy who I liked but then I discovered he had a huge foot fetish. I was willing to give things a go but OMG it was not for me! :D
 
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OH GOD NO, the skin on my feet are peeling and I even have a couple of blisters on my toes from running, nobody wants that in their gob
 
hopefully LOCKDOWN will save me from SANDAL SEASON :zombie:
 
Oh I quite like feet, especially PLUMP ones. I don’t really understand the aversion. Although not FILTHY FEET as appear to be the order of the day in this thread (not you @ameraal :disco:) (and others, now I’ve bothered to read the whole thing)

On the pits and bits front, my mum always likes to tell me how she’s just RINSED THE V. This is in addition to regular updates about her water infections and prolapse :)
 
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God I don’t half fancy PIE now. This of course has everything to do with those horrific three months of @ButterTart forcing me to do nude cartwheels and continually BEND OVER when I was busy with the Mr Muscle, which was particularly challenging when dusting the mantelpiece. Yes! All that and NO PIE!
 
I don't see the issue. Gets a bit of dead skin off and keeps them clean.

I've been known to kick people in the face involuntarily if they touch my feet, its the only place I'm ticklish.
 
We've got a pukka steak pie in the freezer, I'm fucking LIVID that you can't get them in the chippies round here, they only sell wanky Hollands pie.
 
I don’t wash my feet, I just assume they get washed in the water but I do maintain my soles (scrape every 2 weeks or so and lotion after showering every day).
 
Feet are fucking DISGUSTING. Years ago Pre Mr K I met a guy who I liked but then I discovered he had a huge foot fetish. I was willing to give things a go but OMG it was not for me! :D

I was briefly with a guy who was onto FOOT WORSHIP which I could never understand. Something about sucking off the toes and sticking his cock in between both your feet and fucking/wanking off. Each to their own I suppose.
 
On the Professor Ferguson front, why exactly are the POLICE potentially involved in this business about his not being able to resist the temptation of plunging his very substantial girth into a tender lady cellar?

:horny:
 
Ooooh may pop down the CHIPPY for lunch for a cheeky PUKKA!

Oh me too! I did look at delivery the other day but £3.50+ for chips I DON’T THINK SO! Also they’d probably turn up saggy :(
 
On the Professor Ferguson front, why exactly are the POLICE potentially involved in this business about his not being able to resist the temptation of plunging his very substantial girth into a tender lady cellar?

And yet @Star's neighbours have orgies with 50 different people every day and NOTHING
 
God I don’t half fancy PIE now. This of course has everything to do with those horrific three months of @ButterTart forcing me to do nude cartwheels and continually BEND OVER when I was busy with the Mr Muscle, which was particularly challenging when dusting the mantelpiece. Yes! All that and NO PIE!
I didn’t force you to do those cartwheels, I just didn’t stop you.
 
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On the Professor Ferguson front, why exactly are the POLICE potentially involved in this business about his not being able to resist the temptation of plunging his very substantial girth into a tender lady cellar?

:horny:

Wasn’t it just that little git Hancock looking for a soundbite? The police have already said they’re disappointed but don’t actually give a toss.

I see The Heil are going for the slut shaming angle with the ‘married mistress’ having an affair with Prof Ferguson - clearly not understanding the definition of an OPEN MARRIAGE.
 

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