WHAT’S THE NAUGHTIEST THING YOU’VE DONE TODAY?

[Nancy]

I WEIGHED MUSHROOMS AS RED ONIONS IN SAINSBURY’S TODAY BECAUSE THEY ARE CHEAPER AND THEY ALSO GAVE ME BONUS NECTAR POINTS

 

[Jark]

I got a momentary frisson of pleasure from raising Penelope's blood pressure

 

[OutSynk]

I’ve done nothing naughty.

 

[Zu]

I WEIGHED MUSHROOMS AS RED ONIONS IN SAINSBURY’S TODAY BECAUSE THEY ARE CHEAPER AND THEY ALSO GAVE ME BONUS NECTAR POINTS

NOT EXACTLY AVOCADOS THOUGH IS IT

 

[Jark]

I listened to Kylie's Disco leak despite PROMISING EDDIE I WOULDN'T.

 

[Jark]

I don't mean her album - this is just what we call it when Kylie Ann TAKES A PISS.

 

[Rita]

I have just scoffed half a bag of RASPBERRY BON BONS I bought from the petrol station.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

Went out for a vape at work under the guise of an important personal phone call.

 

[Nancy]

THERESA MAY’S GOT NOTHING ON US!

 

[Zu]

I don‘t think I‘ve been naughty at all, so you might have to set me some naughty tasks. I did order an Indian for the second time in four days but that was basic and standard laziness and gluttony which I don’t think counts as NAUGHTY

 

[Zu]

I was amused to read in The Guardian that everyone is stockpiling SWEETS in advance of lockdown and even Joe Wicks can’t be fucked doing his usual number of videos NOT THAT I’VE EVER WATCHED THEM OR REALLY KNOW WHAT THEY ARE

 

[Jark]

surely NOT ordering takeout during a stressful election week which may or may not see the world CONSIGNED TO THE METAPHORICAL RUBBISH BIN FOR GOOD would be the real crime

 

[Beverley]

I’ve done nothing naughty.

YOU DID YOU PRICKTEASE

 

[Kate]

I got up at 10:15 and spent all day watching CNN and researching an illegitimate family member on Ancestry instead of working. Does that count?

 

[Zu]

I got up at 10:15 and spent all day watching CNN and researching an illegitimate family member on Ancestry instead of working. Does that count?

It does if you GET PAID ANYWAY

 

[RS]

I got up at 10:15 and spent all day watching CNN and researching an illegitimate family member on Ancestry instead of working. Does that count?

I barely worked either. And I didn’t go to the gym.

 

[Kate]

It does if you GET PAID ANYWAY

I will yes

 

[AGinAg (37)]

I was also on and off news websites all day at work, but so were several people in the office.

 

[dmlaw]

I stole a big bag of uncounted Republican votes from a counting station in Pennsylvania.

 

[Nancy]

I BURNT 80 VOTES FOR TRUMP

 

[SDF]

Redacted

 

[Nancy]

Redacted

I SAW

 

[SDF]

Don’t tell on me

 

[vespertine]

Put the mask under my nose during my exam.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

I SAW

What was it?

 

[Kate]

He did a shit on Pingu’s toothbrush

 

[Indie]

Went into a pub with someone not from my household.

#2020problems

 

[Rachey]

I stole a handful of facemasks from work because I ran out of the last stash I stole.

 

[ButterTart]

I broke into my neighbour’s house and stole all of her spoons.

 

[octophone]

Farted in a very echoey stairwell. I heard someone several floors down laugh. I was only going down 2 floors and thus evaded detection.