MaTuesday

[AGinAg (37)]

Morning.

 

[SDF]

Morning loves.

I’m feeling even more tired this morning. And I’m late for work.

 

[Indie]

MORNING WITCHES

Working from home day. Best type of day.

 

[big ron]

MORNING!

 

[RS]

It already looks like evening out there

 

[Shirley]

Working from home day. Best type of day.

I'm going to work at home from the end of next week until CHRISTMAS. And if they don't like it they can SACK ME

 

[Yvonne Mondle]

COOEEE

I’m in bed, sky high on Diazepam. The woman in that Fassbinder film ‘Fear of Fear’ seemed to have a lovely time combining it with cognac and being fondled by the doctor so I might try that approach

 

[Shirley]

You know what, your fussing about your computer fan making a noise by lying on the floor, moving the computer box around and banging on it is FAR MORE IRRITATING than the noise itself

 

[octophone]

Well, so much for getting up earlier. Seriously need to get myself back in line. I have the dentist at 9 on Friday and they'll charge me if I don't turn up.

 

[Shirley]

I'm going to work at home from the end of next week until CHRISTMAS. And if they don't like it they can SACK ME

Also I have 23 days of leave to take before January 31 AND THAT'S NOT INCLUDING CHRISTMAS

 

[Star]

I did not know figs are not vegan

 

[Indie]

I did not know figs are not vegan

Neither are avocados, apparently.

 

[octophone]

If you take the definition which excludes avocados, you wouldn't eat anything.

But I;m glad I never liked figs in the first place because UUUURGH

 

[big ron]

I did not know figs are not vegan

I only found out they contain DEAD WASPS very recently.

 

[big ron]

The thing is, the wasp dies of its own accord. Surely if you exclude any food which involves the voluntary death of an animal you can only exist on AIR, because all earth contains decomposed living creatures.

 

[Yvonne Mondle]

Well I can’t say that I’ve ever noticed a DEAD WASP when tucking into a delicious fig so I can only presume they add to the succulent texture and tempting flavour much loved by @octophone

I presume I’ll be getting death threats from the Wasp Protection League but so be it. Better DEAD anyway!

 

[big ron]

I also am now armed with the fact that figs aren't a fruit. They are an inverted flower.

This is up there with peanuts not being a nut.

 

[Yvonne Mondle]

So what on earth are peanuts? A fruit? Vegetable? Please God don’t say they’re MEAT!

 

[big ron]

LEGUME

 

[Yvonne Mondle]

So in other words they’re a PEALEGUME

 

[Yvonne Mondle]

What a shocker

 

[Star]

I only found out they contain DEAD WASPS very recently.

I read about this while tucking into a fig. Sounds silly but why don't you see a wasp in the fig??

 

[Star]

Neither are avocados, apparently.

Oh God, what do they contain?

 

[Indie]

Oh God, what do they contain?

They're not as bad as figs. Basically they hold bees hostage at gunpoint and force them to pollinate.

Not those exact words but something like that.

 

[Yvonne Mondle]

Apparently an avocado stone is basically a curled up and hardened slug

 

[Kate]

I read about this while tucking into a fig. Sounds silly but why don't you see a wasp in the fig??

The fig digests it, apparently.

 

[Yvonne Mondle]

With its TEETH

 

[big ron]

I read about this while tucking into a fig. Sounds silly but why don't you see a wasp in the fig??

The fig releases enzymes which break it down.

 

[Kate]

I have enjoyed the tags.

 

[Star]

They're not as bad as figs. Basically they hold bees hostage at gunpoint and force them to pollinate.

Not those exact words but something like that.

Do the bees die?

 

[Star]

The fig digests it, apparently.

Sick.

 

[octophone]

So what on earth are peanuts? A fruit? Vegetable? Please God don’t say they’re MEAT!

Mmmm, meaty peanuts...

 

[octophone]

I also am now armed with the fact that figs aren't a fruit. They are an inverted flower.

All I can think now are ingrowing hairs and the pain those bastards have caused me. But I also hate wasps and they're all bastards so I wouldn't want figs to stop doing their THANG.

 

[octophone]

They're not as bad as figs. Basically they hold bees hostage at gunpoint and force them to pollinate.

Hang on - who are "they"? "They" would have to be something of the right size to wield the tiny gun and the temperament to do so, to take an evil pleasure in the bee's torment. You know who "they" are? Wasps, that's who. All bastards.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

I don't like figs or dead wasps, but I quite like fig rolls and wasp quiche.

 

[big ron]

The thing is, the wasp dies of its own accord. Surely if you exclude any food which involves the voluntary death of an animal you can only exist on AIR, because all earth contains decomposed living creatures.

I NEED SOME CLOSURE ON THIS THOUGHT PLS

 

[octophone]

wasp quiche

[John Peel] That's Wasp Quiche for you in session, three more from them before the end of the programme...and this is new from The Fall [/John Peel]

 

[octophone]

I NEED SOME CLOSURE ON THIS THOUGHT PLS

Basically, roadkill is fine because the animal is deemed to have committed suicide. Vegans can eat roadkill as well as drink the milk from a self-milked cow. But no figs because they kill wasps.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

Self Milking Cow EP is the first release from Wasp Quiche.

 

[Indie]

Do the bees die?

All bees die.