Iguana
Like beautiful robots dancing alone
Top tip: Don't take a hidden little path when you go for a walk in a park. You might end up having to walk through a bog like I just had to do. Jeans and shoes DEAD

I’m thinking one slice per duck![]()
I ONCE MISTOOK A CARDBOARD BOX FOR A GOOSE
slathered in STORK or not?
Ducks are vegetarian, don't make them eat other birds.
Well, they're not, but I'm sure they don't consume larger birds anyway.

When I used to work in the countryside I once went on a walk where I fell over in a muddy field and got my shirt and trousers covered in mud to much amusement of the officeTop tip: Don't take a hidden little path when you go for a walk in a park. You might end up having to walk through a bog like I just had to do. Jeans and shoes DEAD
When I used to work in the countryside I once went on a walk where I fell over in a muddy field and got my shirt and trousers covered in mud to much amusement of the office
I also got bitten by a horse on my birthday once on a lunch time stroll.
Some people will do anything for attention!
I did fear that was going to be me today for a second to be honest
I also got bitten by a horse on my birthday once on a lunch time stroll.
I should have just gone to Tesco at lunchtime like the rest of the village
I stroked it, it seemed very friendly. Then as soon as I started to walk away I had a sharp pain in my backWere you INTERACTING with the horse?

I stroked it, it seemed very friendly. Then as soon as I started to walk away I had a sharp pain in my back![]()

Perhaps or it knew i’ve eaten horse before and it was planning its revengeAaw. He was just wishing you happy birthday in his own horsey way![]()
Oh my fucking god I didn’t want to leave the flat today but I’m running low on COFFEE.
@Lucille Did Lidl not have their traditional Oktoberfest celebrations this year or did I somehow miss them? I think this unlikely given that I am your resident HAWK EYE FOR TAT UND NOVELTÄT
IT’S OK. ALL SORTED.IS ANYONE GOOD WITH SPOTIFY?
I KEEP THINKING IT’S JANUARYHAS OCTOBER HAPPENED ALREADY?
I’ve not had a fag in FOUR DAYS. Which explains why I’m so MISERABLE and BORED.
I’ve not had a fag in FOUR DAYS. Which explains why I’m so MISERABLE and BORED.