I ranked Mariah's albums

[Joseph]

Now that E=MC is, like, nearly twenty years old, I found it fabulous for a throwback. I have recently rediscovered Bye Bye. The rightful second single

I watched an Emancipation first time listening vid on YouTube recently and he was like “wow this is that throwback stuff my mom listened to when I was a kid” and I wanted to scream Sometimes, like Mariah, I forget how old I actually am

 

[funky]

13. Charmbracelet [7.53]

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Now don't get me wrong, I have a lot of love for CHARMIE but compared to everything else, it's just on the wrong side of beige. Lots of great stuff though, and nothing awful as shown by the lowest mark being a 7. I always thought Irresistible was quite crap but it's grown on me. Remember when we were all panicking about how whispery it is, whereas now I'll take that over belt attempts any day. Anyway it's really good because everything she's ever done is.

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SCREAMING that these votes were for your lowest racking album

 

[funky]

Is there a rule that every song is a 7+ ?

I'm 4 albums in and nothing below

 

[dUb]

I just quite like her funky

 

[funky]

Looking at this and I really have to say I DON'T KNOW HER to Memoirs. It really has faded into the abyss for me.

 

[funky]

And yeah Emancipation has NOT aged well, I don't know why gays cream their knickers for it, but I guess you had to be 15 and losing your virginity in 2005

 

[funky]

The virtual Prisoner erasure though - giving it an 8 and saying it's iconic without any capitalisation is so heterosexual and a criminally poor validation of that song

 

[funky]

Emancipation at 12?! The CHOICES hunny

dUb is many things but BASIC is not one of them.

 

[funky]

#Beautiful gets a 9

#wellthatiscertainlyachoice

Giving Dedicated the TEN is (almost) penance though.

 

[Tisch]

Honey - 08 Disappointing irrelevant. I didn't get it. Nobody around me got it. If you're a hardcore fan great, if not don't bother.

 

[funky]

I feel like I need to go back to E=MC2 at some point. I mean it has "I'm That Chick" for STARTERS. It's just that "Touch My Body" is such a tragic piece of sonic diarrhea that I've never been drawn to go back to it. Absolutely one of the worst songs of that decade with its plinky plonky casio production and the most basic lyric+melody combination I've heard this side of "Oops I Did It Again", everyone involved should be SHOT but unfortunately a lot of people seem to like listening to R&B songs that sound like they were written for a Teletubbies soundtrack, so here we are

 

[funky]

I might have mentioned this once or twice before but dub brought it up again not me

 

[Tisch]

Huge casual speaking here, but E=mc2 is the scientifically proved best.

*lightly bops to Side Effects*

 

[dUb]

#Beautiful gets a 9

#wellthatiscertainlyachoice

Giving Dedicated the TEN is (almost) penance though.

OH BABY YOU KNOW!

 

[funky]

I need to listen to this again. I honestly don’t think I’ve played it since the year of release except for #Beautiful

GET OUT

It's her best album since Butterfly!

 

[funky]

4. Music Box [8.09]

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Yes funky Dreamlover is an 8 and I'm not changing it. This was the album that introduced me to her via my sisters loving it and while in latter years I tried to be sniffy about it and how BLAND IT IS, there's no denying most of this material. Anytime You Need A Friend is always top of my mind when I think about my favourite ever Mariah song and while I could very much live without ever hearing Hero and Without You again, I love everything else. A true 90s BLOCKBUSTER of an album, not everybody has that to their credit.

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The fact that you mentioned me but didn't tag me just shows you weren't ready for my wrath.

This is a hate crime. I'm printing this out and bringing it with me on our next Dublin jaunt so I can watch you squirm and apologise because there's no way you ACTUALLY BELIEVE THOSE SCORES.

 

[funky]

Caution

 

[funky]

Daydream Interlude a 7.

Okay we need to have a conversation.

 

[funky]

I mean I can't argue with the Top 2.

Well I CAN, but let's save it until I look you in the eye and make you feel bad.

 

[funky]

I totted up Butterfly on my end and I was only a couple of points below you!

 

[K.C.]

Have y'all gone MAD? Caution is an INSTITUTION and absolutely classic Mariah. Ugh, I still love how slinky and melancholy Giving Me Life is.

 

[Sheena]

Caution is SO FUCKING BORING. The fact it was hailed as some sort of MASTERPIECE by LOONS was beyond me.

 

[K.C.]

Sheena why the violence?

 

[Sheena]

LET US HIJACK THIS THREAD TO POST OUR OWN RANKINGS:

1. Butterfly
2. Daydream
3. Emotions
4. Mariah Carey
5. The Emancipation of Mimi

6. Music Box
7. Rainbow

8. Glitter
9. E=MC2

10.Caution
11.Me...I Am Mariah
12.Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel
13.Charmbracelet

 

[Joseph]

The ranking make much more sense on the audio version where @dUb raps and tries to pull one over on us all by declaring Don’t Stop (Funkin’ 4 Jamaica) is an 8/10

I really need to do my own loon version of album rates with her but I already know I will have far too many OMG THIS IS A TEN moments

 

[Sheena]

This thread has made me realise I needed to hunt again for Rarities on vinyl and I've found a copy for £25 on Discogs, so THAT WILL DO NICELY.

 

[Joseph]

I need to listen to this again. I honestly don’t think I’ve played it since the year of release except for #Beautiful

Now I remember why

 

[VV]

Everything up to and including Butterfly is Gold.

After that, I don't care for very much.

 

[dUb]

Rolling Stone's rank:

#1 Butterfly
#2 E=MC²
#3 Memoirs Of An Imperfect Angel
#4 The Emancipation Of Mimi
#5 Daydream
#6 Caution
#7 Merry Christmas
#8 Music Box
#9 Mariah Carey
#10 Glitter
#11 Charmbracelet
#12 Emotions
#13 Merry Christmas II You
#14 Rainbow
#15 Me. I Am Mariah… The Elusive Chanteuse

 

[Sheena]

OT: I found a copy of Charmbracelet on vinyl for £7ish in Japan and the completist in me couldn't resist (even though I don't own most of the latter day albums). I'm going to give it ANOTHER TRY.

 

[K.C.]

I think this is a pretty good ranking.