ANDU BURNHOM announces CROP TOP SUMMER

NA(ndu)R:

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Lisa Nandu promises a free belly ring from Claire's to inhabitants of ALL towns.
 
In FINAL ACT as energy secretary ED MILUBUND announces NEW DISCOUNT SCHEME for ENVIRONMENTALLY FRIENDLY Sash! window installation
 
Wus Struuting spotted SOBBING in jeans and a nice top amid mounting rumours he didn't get the memo.
 
Andu Burnhom EMERGES from Prime Ministerial car on Downing Street to declare "EVERYBODY GET UP AND DANCE"
 
Andu von-Burnhorn dazzles journalists by stripping off to crop top and saucy thong.

"If it's good enough for Manchester" declared a clearly aroused, both in his nipples and genitals, von-Burnhorn.
 
Andi Bornhun said to be squealing like a piggy little bitch after discovering Norman Major's PORCELAIN DILDO COLLECTION.
 
Shandi Bingbong has announced plans to demolish 11 Downing Street and replace it with an abattoir.

"She's had it too good for too long" Shandi blurted out in reference to arch enemy Jessu J.
 
Speculation mounts that Hole Next Door will be named Chancellor of the Exchequer as Undy Burnhum seeks to plug the gape left in the public purse.
 

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