STUNNING.
STUNNING.
C
COB
Guest
This blonde girl is so anonymous, does she even have a NAME?
C
COB
Guest
Maybe she's just dull compared to MARY LOU REST IN PARADISE MY ANGEL.
VoR
Take it or leave it
What middle American high-school doesn't have a nightmarish basement filled with old prom dresses and mementos of TRAGEDIES PAST?
C
COB
Guest
Oh DEAR
VoR
Take it or leave it
That awkward moment when you accidentally set fire to your girlfriend and go on to become principal of the school.
C
COB
Guest
At least move a town over!
VoR
Take it or leave it
Why is Joan Cusack casually carving a hellish monkey's paw?
C
COB
Guest
Her friend is such a bitch 
Hope you win, KELLY
Hope you win, KELLY
C
COB
Guest
Why is she upset? Is it just because she's a GOTH?
Beverley
GUESS WHO’S BACK?!
POOR JOAN
VoR
Take it or leave it
I'm not sure we've spent enough time with Jess for this emotional moment to really LAND, but I appreciate the effort.
C
COB
Guest
Oh it's about a boy. What a crap goth for giving a shit!
Beverley
GUESS WHO’S BACK?!
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COB
Guest
Oh she's pregnant, now I feel bad 
Beverley
GUESS WHO’S BACK?!
Omg the pregnancy storyline that NOBODY CARES ABOUT 
VoR
Take it or leave it
Yes Jess, the 16th century Wizard look will definitely hide the baby bump when you hit your third trimester.
Beverley
GUESS WHO’S BACK?!
‘I guess I’ve got some choices to make 
’
’
C
COB
Guest
Oh this won't end well OR be good for baby
Beverley
GUESS WHO’S BACK?!
OMG NOT THE BOX!!!!1
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COB
Guest
When they find her the next day:
"Jess... made a different choice"
"Jess... made a different choice"
VoR
Take it or leave it
SCREAM at her being hurled out like a rag doll
WHAT AN EXIT
WHAT AN EXIT
Beverley
GUESS WHO’S BACK?!
Serving Madonna at the BRITS in 2000 and whatever
C
COB
Guest
Love that this bloke was so traumatised by his time with Mary Lou that he took the CLOTH.
C
COB
Guest
Maybe he knew he'd never have better
Beverley
GUESS WHO’S BACK?!
Omg so he’s a PRIEST now! Giving us NARRATIVE!
VoR
Take it or leave it
Did you hear? School's closed today because Jess hanged herself and then hurled her broken corpse through a window in a traumatic teen pregnancy meltdown!
No way!
No way!
C
COB
Guest
Not psychic auditory hallucinations!
VoR
Take it or leave it
Blonde (STILL haven't caught her name) really bounced back quickly from her best friend's traumatic death!
C
COB
Guest
Prom just won't be the same without Jess MOPING in the corner about her BABY!
VoR
Take it or leave it
YOU SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH BITCH
VoR
Take it or leave it
"I'm a teenager!"
Voiceover: He was decidedly not a teenager.
Voiceover: He was decidedly not a teenager.
C
COB
Guest
I want to say blonde girl is called Vicki or possibly Vicky, but she's really not giving us much yet.
C
COB
Guest
That vision 