MONEY SAVING TIPS

[Cloud]

Save money on tissues - just wipe your dick on the curtains

 

[wildchild]

My tips:

- cook yourself instead of eating out
- rent out your villa ( @Rita )
- sell drugs to the cops — you won’t have to pay for speeding
- walk to the gym, instead of taking a taxi
- if you fly Business, get pissed on the free wine ( @Rita )
- put 500 on your savings account each month
- some of the cheaper champagnes drink quite nicely

 

[big ron]

PHOTOSYNTHESISE

 

[Kratz]

Go on the game (or back on for most of you) to earn some extra pocket money

 

[wildchild]

When you attend a wedding, don’t bring a gift, just add your name to a random card on the gift table.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

Eat your own fingers. Don't worry they regrow.

 

[AGinAg (37)]

At my wedding I dumped my groom at the altar and married my secret lover - my own father.

Absolutely worth it, I sold my story to Take a Break for £200. I bought a Dominoes take away and did my big shop out of it.

 

[Inner Smile]

Children crying out for chicken but purse strings tight? Pop to your local supermarket with a buggy, find yourself a fat chook, remove the wrapping and pop it in the buggy. If security stop you, tell them it’s your NEW BABY and if they say it looks odd, tell them it came out funny and they’re being DISCRIMINATORY. Threaten to report them and pop home with the winnings to make one of your SIGNATURE DISHES for the weans