My Top 500 Songs (complete!!)

Sardonicus said:
OUR SON getting to number 1 probably represents the peak of SAW.

I saw her at a hastily COVID rearranged Chester Pride held in a CAR PARK in 2021. She genuinely does have a good voice. Atomic Kitten (sans Katona & Frost) were decent too, while The Cheeky Girls didn't bother turning up. I still remember the look of PANICKED DESPERATION on the face of the poor drag queen host telling everyone they hadn't arrived.
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OH NO YOU DIDN'T! :D Isn't it ALWAYS in a CAR PARK? NOT THAT I'D KNOW
 
223 Lucie Jones - Never Give Up On You (2017)

Ah the year we sent our great white hope to Eurovision to compensate for our political sins. Of course Lucie was a pro, the song was a big old ballad, and the staging looked awesome. I'm not sure it was Brexit that left it mid table. I'd give 50% of the blame to Lucie going full musical theatre, looking like she was chewing her way out of a bag of spanners. The rest was chance, 2017 always struck me as quite a random Eurovision year.

Do indulge yourself with the 7th Heaven Remix. It's been said that we should have entered the remix.



 
222 New Order - True Faith (1987)

The first showing from New Order, a band I was lucky enough to see live back in the 90s.

Wistful, bittersweet, sometimes abstract lyrics accompany an energetic, melodic, drum machine and synth heavy, classic pop track of the highest standard.

You won't have to wait long for the next one.

 
Sardonicus said:
Love it. Never got what differentiated the 1994 remix from the 1987 release - both sound the same to me.
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It was the 1994 version that got me into it, although I'm pretty I knew it already, as it was a bit of a radio favourite.

I think the production is just a bit fuller, more pop as was the option by 1994.
 
220 Future Islands - Seasons (Waiting On You) (2014)

A brilliant synth/ late new wave track that could easily have been a Killers song. Thankfully with no traces of Brandon Flowers I was able to enjoy this.

I can help you understand why this was not a proper hit, just watch the live performance. The performance is odd... odd like Julie Walters would say it was too much for a Mrs Overall skit. While the vocals occasionally veer into a drag queen doing Liza (Minnelli not Tarbuck). I don't think he's a bad person, just misguided.



 
221 Kylie Minogue - Turn It Into Love (1988)

I almost missed this, big in Japan song.

There is a genuine argument for Peter Waterman to be executed on live TV, for general reasons initially, but specifically for not releasing this guaranteed no.1.

Don't bother with the jumble sale Hazel Dean version, God love her but like with Mandy, Kylie was a a star on and off record. There's a reason she's just had a no.1 hit 37 years later (I know, let us have it).

 
Actually I don't mind a bit of Future Islands. His live performances are what made them famous.
 
219 Kylie Minogue - Stop Me From Falling (2018)

I presume we mostly pretend Golden didn't happen, even though it felt like a breakthrough moment after much of the mid 10s she spent in jazz, Christmas and duets hell. I barely touched the original, the reggaeton mix with Gente de Zona was a lot of fun. Ironic that it came from the country album. Genres are ao confusing these days.

Justice for Rainup Shitter

 
218 New Order - Bizarre Love Triangle (1986)

More from Sumner, Hook et al.

A glorious piece of Fairlight sequencing serenaded with the normal melancholic pop lyrics you'd expect from the band almost named The Witch Doctors of Zimbabwe.

 
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217 Sash!, Tina Cousins - Mysterious Times (1998)

The fourth no.2 in a row from Sash!, who are actually four people. Wait until you find out about Alice Deejay.

Obviously a fucking belter, much of the credit must be paid to professional Daisy Donovan impersonator and one part of the much lauded Thank ABBA For the Music - Tina Cousins OBE. A wistful, dare I say intellectual observational number about the crazy crazy world we live in. Who needs Locke, Descartes, Kant, Marx and Sartre when you have Cousins?

 
I listened to it yesterday. Their best sound as here is a mixture of grim and god. And the many dazzling edits and some remixes help it feel everlasting.

Edit: Tina good too.
 
216 Nirvana - Smells Like Teen Spirit (1991)

Fun fact: t-shirt brand Nirvana, were also a rock band.

It may sounds dangerous and anarchistic, but hidden amongst the cynicism, the irony, the violence is a brilliant pop song. Say what you like about it being the only appearance from within the genre on this list, but it's such an elevated moment in pop music, it turned a generation of 90s kids into sneering, grumpy, cynical sods, utterly bored with the decade when history ended. Also Kurt Cobain was hot.

For fun enjoy the Abigail version



 
:disco: True Faith should by rights be one of the PERENNIAL CLASSICZ of the 80s, and I do think perhaps by a different act it might have been, but here its legacy always seemed somewhat thwarted by the stronger prevalence of Blue Monday or Love Will Never...

I was FOOLED by Dame Tina presenting herself as such a DEEP THINKER, until I saw at a Pride event and realised she was Kelly Llorenna without poppers.
 
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I love Abigail's Thunderpuss produced If It Don't Fit. It truly is the only time they came close to producing their own It's Not Right. Her voice is like the Deuce singer - maybe they should have called when she left, the public might not have known the difference with the right hair cut.

 
215 Freddie Mercury - Living On My Own (1985/ 1993)

Quite an unlikely no.1. Not that Freddie Mercury having a posthumous chart topper was unlikely, seeing the absolutely frenzy following his death. Rather a house remix of his flop 1985 single from his Mr Bad Guy album, becoming a huge hit was unlikely.

The first CD single I ever bought and the only appearance of Freddie on this list. If Queen would have appeared it would have been Radio Gaga or I Want To Break Free.

 
212 Blondie - Maria (1999)

The third of five appearances for Blondie, and this their legendary comeback hit, their sixth and final no.1 hit. What an absolute behemoth to come back with. Power pop, that'll shake the deepest coma awake, complete with some rather alluring bells. Debbie is on fine form here, selling the shit out of and elevating a fairly simple track. We sang along, we wept, we danced. Truly one of the great comebacks in recorded history.

 
I’m honestly the Only Girl (In The World) that doesn’t care for EDM Rihanna.

We Found Love I can just about stomach. The rest do my absolute tits in.
 
211 Maxx - Get-a-Way (1994)

Finally some shameless 90s eurodance and reason for @Kate to be in here.

Dull soulless dance music indeed, complete with a horribly jarring lyric "I'm a white ragga man" yuck. Thankfully the keyboard rift and chorus are glorious machine made eurodance. Fun fact, the singer who became the lead singer of Maxx (and still is), neither sung or appeared in the video, only turning up during the promotional campaign. For reasons known only to the management team, they renamed her LINDA MEEK.

 
Sardonicus said:
The Freddie song is a bit of a BOP, & perhaps an early example of the 90s trick of depressing lyrics set to a bit of upbeat dance. I always found the images of his mid 80s birthday party in the video quite haunting too.
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I still must insist that I end up at one of Freddie's parties in the afterlife.
 
No one will ever BEEDADEEDOHRUMPYPUMPY BEEDADEEDOHRUMPYPUMPY BEEDADEEDOHRUMPYPUMPY RUMPYBUMPYBA-DOH! like the much missed SIR FRED :(
 
Turning Living On My Own into a Haddaway sidesplitter remains one of his best ever tracks.

Maria is up there with their best no matter what the contemporary reviews said. It reeked of #1 from the moment it started chugging its juice on you.

Rihanna. Not quite her Haddaway moment, but the closest we've got to it yet.
 
straightorbroken said:
Turning Living On My Own into a Haddaway sidesplitter remains one of his best ever tracks.

Maria is up there with their best no matter what the contemporary reviews said. It reeked of #1 from the moment it started chugging its juice on you.

Rihanna. Not quite her Haddaway moment, but the closest we've got to it yet.
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Will be using the term "Haddaway moment" in relation to everything.
 
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210 Tatu - All the Things She Said (2003)

According to some on Moopy this is the greatest song of all time, because it appears in some overrated TV show, that is currently making your auntie cum.

It is of course an absolute pop masterpiece, let alone being the biggest musical product to come out of Russia, this side of the Berlin Wall (rest easy PPK).

Product is the word, aside from the triumph of the song, which thrills every step from verses to bridge to chorus, it was of course famous for the fake lesbian school girl singers, at least one of whom turned out to be a raging homophobe.

Either way a brilliant side note within pop music.

 
209 Celine Dion - Think Twice (1994)

The fourth of five appearances for Queen Celine. That she had two UK million sellers in the 1990s was remarkable really. This by far is the least recalled, which is a crying shame, because it's magnificent.

It starts off leading the listener to conclude that this will be a humble track, but as every verse and chorus appears the drama escalates to devastating levels. And the ad libs, oh the ad libs.

Truly a master at work. THIS is getting serious.

 
Wasn’t “Think Twice” the one with the ridiculous chart run? Or was that “The Power Of Love” ?
 
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