Local news in non-rioting places

Colchester has been so all over the news the last few days it's not even local. It's even prompted Elton John to come and play here! WTF?!
 
Kate said:
Nice of them to make out that was the reason when it looks like it was actually because her baby was ill!

I misread and thought the baby was called Jeff. What a surprisingly un-celeb baby name, I was thinking.
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Yes, if you read it, it's a complete non-story. She's obviously pissed Bolton off in the past.
 
It's an amazing piece of passive aggressiveness and really rather wittily written for a local rag. Someone's gunning for a spot on the Mail's showbiz team :D
 
Poor Patch :(

Now WHY are the Dairylea Lunchable Lesbians not in here yet
 
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It's not very impressive

I bet my MOTHER could grow a BETTER TACHE THAN THAT

Sorry MA!
 
The 19-year-old student, of Bilborough, had saved up in order to buy a limited edition Day One version of the console as a surprise Christmas present for his four-year-old son, McKenzie.
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McKenzie must think his dad is a prize twat.

For anyone who thinks Tom Daley is too young to date a 39 year old, it's hard to think he could be the father of a 4 year old.
 
I for one would find it hard to believe Tom Daley has a four year old son.
 
Only in Wrexham do you get a half price sale in a 99p shop and police presence is necessary! Who are these people that are so desperate?!
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Quite. Despite it only being 10 miles away I NEVER EVER EVER GO THERE
 
He said: “Do you think I look like the sort of person who goes around smearing people with muck?”
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Mark-Follos-6579800.jpg


:eyes:
 
YEAH RIGHT. She probably heard it from her mother or some other member of her family! :D
 
"Kiannah has blurted it out once or twice in front of other people - it is highly embarrassing."

If my son shouted FUCKING GAZELLES out loud in public I'd buy him some new stuff!
 
He could steal even the most guarded of things (namely my HEART) and he steals a BLACKBERRY?
 
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