Moopyvision 2010-2019 Round 8: Israel, Portugal & Russia

[win_the_game]

.

 

[Dark Carnival]

He looks like a right ROTTEN COW

(With a very tiny smudge of )

!

 

[Zu]

OH WELL DONE @Alla on your exquisite taste

Incidentally the vocal DID NOT “completely fall apart on the night”. It fell apart during the SEMI when he failed to hit the high notes and caused all manner of gay panic chez Zu thank you very much

Anyway I love that one. A Brel-inspired song in Hebrew? WHAT’S NOT TO LIKE?

 

[Penelope]

Harel Skaat appears to have somewhat QUESTIONABLY steered clear of facial hair as he has progressed into the twink chill wind of his thirties and the poor love now looks a bit like Peter Tatchell after a touch of the meth

 

[Alla]

OMG Milim totally robbed, wtf? At least I can count on good old Zu.

 

[Dark Carnival]

Oh the meth look counts as an improvement chez DC

 

[lolly]

She's not going to age well

 

[Penelope]

She's not going to age well

Future tense love, really?

 

[VoR]

6th: Moran Mazor - Rak Bishvilo (100pts)

God that dress really was an absolute BOOT, wasn't it? I recall getting simultaneous text messages from three different friends when she came on, all along the lines of 'OMG WTF is this one wearing?!?!

Shame, I do find this one to be rather lovely, despite essentially being a total re-write of Milim. It was well thought of at the time, so much so that the over-confident Israelis sent a whole documentary crew over to capture her inevitable victory. I can't find it now sadly, but the footage of her sobbing desolately in the green room, then sadly watching the final alone in her hotel room ON HER BIRTHDAY is the kind of TV cruelty Jeremy Kyle and his cronies couldn't even begin to fathom.

2 x 12 (Win The Game, dmlaw)
2 x 0 (sewerynsven, Jacques)

 

[Alla]

Kala darling, after making the announcement, did you actually vote?

 

[dmlaw]

I'd like to say that I'm surprised Ding Dong hasn't been on yet, but I'm really not.

 

[Alla]

I was very distracted by her tits almost popping out of the dress.

 

[lolly]

Who did she send to the dress fitting?

 

[ButterTart]

Made of Stars was outstanding. Bex Shiner from Big Brother 2008 delivers a sweeping ballad... what’s not to love?

 

[Penelope]

Honestly it was clearly the styling och consulting equivalent of ENRON at CHEZ MAZOR, but even PAST the obvious failures (both institutional AND SOCIETAL) that occurred for that dress to be allowed onstage, I'm still all these years on astounded that a woman who would've clearly looked OBVIOUSLY STUNNING in contacts was immediately turned into FLABBY JANE THE LIBRARIAN with those HORRENDOUS GLASSES

Imagine what she must have DONE for NOBODY TO TELL HER!

 

[Zu]

I'd like to say that I'm surprised Ding Dong hasn't been on yet, but I'm really not.

Oh you know what these girls are like. Any old has-been with a half-arsed bit of old tat which no-one in their right mind would find acceptable and they’re lapping at it like dehydrated spaniels

 

[Penelope]

Oh you know what these girls are like. Any old has-been with a half-arsed bit of old tat which no-one in their right mind would find acceptable and they’re lapping at it like dehydrated spaniels

If I didn't have SOME semblance of predictability and stability in this I'd have NONE AT ALL!

 

[Alla]

Oh you know what these girls are like. Any old former glories has-been with a half-arsed bit of old tat which no-one in their right mind would find acceptable and they’re lapping at it like dehydrated spaniels

Are we still talking about Carpool Karaoke?

 

[Penelope]

Are we still talking about Carpool Karaoke?

No darling we're still on SUZY

 

[VoR]

5th: IMRI - Alive (141pts)

Serving 'Bel Ami actor who dies a tragic early death under murky circumstances involving GHB and a toilet brush' realness, it's lovely IMRI!

His bicep baring, lip biting sex appeal is the obvious draw here, but the song's a decent enough basic banger too. The bit where it all goes a bit middle eastern is obviously the best part, but then it just goes back to the start again and never comes back! Annoying, as this could have banged so much harder. (Much like IMRI in my dreams last night, AMIRITEBOYS?)

3 x 12 (Raining on me, Jacques, Superstylin')
1 x 1 (Dark Carnival)

 

[lolly]

I was WORRIED I'd be in for a PUBLIC LYNCHING when my Ding Dong score was revealed as the lowest. SEEMINGLY NOT!

 

[dmlaw]

Now there's a song with nothing to offer anyone who isn't currently sporting a MISGUIDED STIFFIE.

 

[Penelope]

Apparently Dame Im is now a MARKETING MANAGER, which almost certainly pays well enough to keep her well-stocked in mephedrone

 

[Dark Carnival]

Oh you know what these girls are like. Any old has-been with a half-arsed bit of old tat which no-one in their right mind would find acceptable and they’re lapping at it like dehydrated spaniels

I hear SOUR GRAPES and it's making me HIGH
And FLY

 

[win_the_game]

Honestly it was clearly the styling och consulting equivalent of ENRON at CHEZ MAZOR, but even PAST the obvious failures (both institutional AND SOCIETAL) that occurred for that dress to be allowed onstage, I'm still all these years on astounded that a woman who would've clearly looked OBVIOUSLY STUNNING in contacts was immediately turned into FLABBY JANE THE LIBRARIAN with those HORRENDOUS GLASSES

Imagine what she must have DONE for NOBODY TO TELL HER!

Moran has had quite the transformation since then and no doubt denies all links to her past.

 

[Penelope]

I hear SOUR GRAPES and it's making me HIGH
And FLY

Honestly the VIDEO OF THE DECADE!

 

[Zu]

I note that we haven’t had ‘Golden Boy’ yet. @Dark Carnival WILL be pleased!

 

[Penelope]

Anyway, I do quite like to think Dame Im spent the two weeks in Kyiv blindfolded and hind up in her hotel room with each and every one of her backing dancers the entire time she was offstage

 

[Dark Carnival]

Honestly the VIDEO OF THE DECADE!

IKR

 

[Dark Carnival]

I note that we haven’t had ‘Golden Boy’ yet. @Dark Carnival WILL be pleased!

 

[Zu]

GOLDEN BOY FTW

 

[D5K]

I note that we haven’t had ‘Golden Boy’ yet. @Dark Carnival WILL be pleased!

This sickens me.

 

[D5K]

Well, that and the inexplicably decent DANCE MIX, which they really, really should have switched to.

Listening to this now. Oh my god it just keeps building and building.

 

[win_the_game]

Anyway, I do quite like to think Dame Im spent the two weeks in Kyiv blindfolded and hind up in her hotel room with each and every one of her backing dancers the entire time she was offstage

Well of course. He's clearly the sort of Grindr gay that leaves the door unlocked.

 

[lolly]

I wish grindr existed 25 years ago

 

[VoR]

4th: Dana International - Ding Dong (146pts)

Oh Dana

One of the true ICONS of 90s Eurovision, this return should have been a triumphant victory lap for Israel's queen of pop. Sadly, the song really was a cheap, dashed-off piece of tawdry rubbish any way you slice it. Yes, she sold the hell out of it with much glamour and strutting, and the lady herself remains ineffably fabulous, but there's only so much silk you can make from a sow's ear this rancid.

Sorry Dana. We still love you, but what a waste of stardom.

4 x 12 (Pingu, Penelope, sewerynsven, SDF)
4 x 1 (Ag, dmlaw, superstylin', Buttertart)

 

[Penelope]

Well of course. He's clearly the sort of Grindr gay that leaves the door unlocked.

I QUITE EXPECT his hole"s developed a CALLUS by now

 

[lolly]

YAY

 

[Dark Carnival]

Haleli et hayom shemevi lach et halaila
Haleli et hazman sheya’ir otach
Hu yavi lach ge’ula

 

[Penelope]

WTF?!

You COMPLETE FUCKING PIGS wouldn't do this to EUPHORIA!